Wait until Kim Kardashian West hears this one!
Hmm, sounds exactly what a good frenemy friend would say!
[Image via Instagram.]
We've waited so long for this moment!
On Monday night, the much anticipated roast of Justin Bieber aired on Comedy Central and it did NOT disappoint.
Oh, and if you're struggling to wrap your head around why Martha attended a roast for Biebaroni, know that she was arguably the most blunt of the group!
"Justin, before I go, here is my final piece of advice. You need to settle down, bring some balance into your life, find yourself the right gal but she'll have to be someone on your level, someone powerful and famous and rich, someone you can smoke a joint with or indulge in the occasional three-way. I'm talking about a playa in the board room and a freak in the bedroom. So Justin, my final piece of advice is, call me."
Wow! The 73-year-old is NOT messing around! Ha!
But wait, Martha wasn't the only one who got Biebs good — check out the singer's longtime pal, Ludacris, throwing him some shade (below)!
Wow! If Justin Bieber was a turkey, he'd be cooked!
The 21-year-old singer was the main target at Comedy Central's Justin Bieber Roast and celebs really took their shots!
Nothing was off-limits, from his relationship with Selena Gomez to, well, ANYTHING!
Some of the roasters were host Kevin Hart, Ludacris, Will Ferrell as Ron Burgundy, and even Martha Stewart! Sadly though, Seth Rogen chickened out and didn't take Justin up on his offer to roast the pop star to his face.
When it was all over, Justin joked then was serious, saying:
"Damn, you guys were brutal. This was supposed to be a birthday present. When people ask me what I got for my 21st birthday, I'll tell them I got my d*ck kicked in. I should have known… I lost some of my best qualities. I'm looking forward to being someone to be proud of. Someone close to me once said how you rise from a fall is how you are truly defined as a man."
We believe in you, JB!
The roast won't air until March 30th on Comedy Central, but in the meantime here are some of the best jokes
She's a true entrepreneur!
Martha Stewart has long dreamed of opening her own eatery and it's finally time! Martha Stewart Café will be opening at 601 W. 26th Street, the Starrett-Lehigh building — where her company is headquartered!
The felon and homemaker extraordinaire will be offering coffee blends, the finest teas, and hand-selected pastries from all over the city. In a statement, Miz Stewart explained:
Martha Stewart will be joining other stars in lampooning the pop star, which tapes next weekend but airs at the end of the month.
The domestic diva even took to Twitter to confirm the news, saying:
We're sure the 73-year-old has LOTS to teach the 21-year-old pop star.
Is Martha Stewart encouraging no-holds-barred fighting?!
Well not quite.
However, given the recent influx of Twitter feuds (ahem Khloe Kardashian and Amber Rose), the New York Post asked the Martha Stewart Living publisher during the Erin Fetherston show on Wednesday what she thought about people hashing out their differences in less than 140 characters.
And her response may surprise you!
The 73-year-old revealed:
Super Bowl Sunday is quickly approaching, and if you still haven't figured out what you'll be serving at your party — what HAVE you been doing with your life?!
Just kidding, we know the days leading up to the big game are hectic!
Which is why we compiled a list of AH-Mazing appetizers your favorite celebs make in times like these!
They're all pretty easy peasy to prepare, so your football game day will be stress-free — except for the entire battle between the Patriots and Seahawks! That's going to be epic!
Ch-ch-check out some of the awesome recipes to satisfy your Super Bowl appetite (below)!
Ever wonder how Martha Stewart uses the bathroom?
The answer is probably not… but that isn't going to stop the domestic goddess from telling you!
On today's episode of The Meredith Vieira Show, the talk show host asks the 73-year-old lifestyle guru just exactly how she approaches the potty.
The journalist asks the revealing question: