Let us guess: you've been 'churning your own butter' too much and now you have one arm that is super bulky while the other one is basically wasting away.
We have some solutions for you.
1. You're addicted to masturbation and it's time to get help, LOLz.
Train at home
Some days it's just not possible to get yourself down to the gym. But that doesn't mean you have any excuse not to train in the comfort of your own home. All you need for this routine is a pair of dumb-bells and a spare 15 minutes.
Superset your training
Want a foolproof way to faster muscle growth? Shock your system with antagonistic supersets – and save hours of training time.
Concentrate on fast-twitch fibres
Your fast-twitch fibres are used less in day-to-day life. Which means focusing on them is a sure-fire route to faster muscle gains. Short, high-intensity sets are the way to go. Buy yourself a medicine ball and get rapid results with exercises such as these.
Upgrade your shoulders
The quickest route to that coveted V-shape physique? Create the illusion that your waist is smaller by bulking up your shoulders and upper back.
Get a leg up
Training your legs rarely makes for an exciting gym session, but it’s utterly necessary to prevent injury and ensure you don’t start to resemble Johnny Bravo. Build up your lower body fast with this hardcore move.
Chest in time
Spend just five minutes on your chest with a couple of dumb-bells for maximum results with this simple fast-growth workout. Keeping your chest muscles tense and working for the full 300 seconds catalyses rapid gains.
Be a Baracus
This circuit from the stars of the A-team can be done at the gym or at home – all you need is dumb-bells, bar-bells and a skipping rope. Though a mohawk and propensity to feel pity for fools may also come in useful.
Work out like an animal
If you want to become a true alpha male you could do worse than copying the exercise style of wild gorillas. Keep up the pace by working at 80% of your one-rep max to achieve true HIT status.
Keep yourself motivated
Whether you’re looking for reasons to get up in the morning for pre-work training, or you need an extra boost to take your supersets to failure, there are many ways to remedy your flailing focus. Some techniques might seem over the top, but always remember: you’ve got to treat yourself mean to keep yourself keen.
Adopt a complete plan
Want to get the right amounts of carbs and protein but don’t have enough time to conjure up a diet plan to match your workouts? Easy – just use ours. This detailed workout schedule and meal plan will get you ripped in no time.
Easy enough, right?
Now get out there and get jacked!
Unless you're addicted, then NO MORE jacking for you! Ha!
[Image via AP Images.]