This is NOT a good look for you, Michael Phelps!
We understand you feel the need to up your bro-game because Ryan Lochte has seemingly perfected it and it got him a TV show, but we'd rather know you as the fearless, peerless athlete that dominates for our country — not some guy that grows porn staches and doesn't use a hat correctly in his spare time!
Hope everything outside the facial hair business is going well, though, Michael!
We'd like to see you get your own show too!
[Image via Splash News.]