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Melissa Etheridge's Ex Writes A Poem About Burning Their Child With A Cigarette

Melissa Etheridge and tammy

YES! POETRY!!

It's a form of expression almost excessively used by angry teens and people in rehab; but sometimes poetry is used to make us laugh at you define yourself in court!

Yesterday, we reported that Melissa Etheridge filed documents with custody court that claim her ex, Tammy Lynn Michaels, burnt their child with a cigarette.

Lucky for us, Tammy has responded to Melissa's accusation… with a poem!!

In the brilliant piece of writing, Tammy explains that she was standing "20 feet away" from the kids, while taking part in her "bad habit" when her 3-year-old son playfully attacked her. Here's an excerpt from the poem:

"how does one know
that her amazing son
with strong and luscious arms and legs
would try to play
Invisible Monster Tackling Mommy
at
that
precise
moment?????"

Well, that explains everything! LOL!

Now we understand how she may have mistakenly burnt her child. However, now we have a new question: WHY A POEM???

Treat yourself to the entire ridiculous masterfully written poem… AFTER THE JUMP!!

"standing outside
all that clean fresh air
of Los Angeles
(smog-free, of course)
but i'm standing outside nonetheless
because

dun-dun-dunnnnnnnn
i had a cigarette and i was smoking

now kids
they don't always listen,
do they?

when you stand 20 feet away from them and say

'Hey- Mommy's gonna stand over here for awhile
because I'm doing my bad habit;
you guys can't be up against me for
a few minutes'
how does one know
that her amazing son
with strong and luscious arms and legs
would try to play
Invisible Monster Tackling Mommy
at
that
precise
moment?????

one second I was watching a kid chase a dog,
the next second
a kid was jumping me from behind

how come i was the only one that hollered?
that kid has insane pain tolerance
his tender flesh to the nicotine pencil on fire
so fast, so quick, he insisted it didn't hurt

gimme a break kid
don't try to be a hero
that's gotta suck

after a(nother) lecture on listening to words
(and staying away from Mommy when
she's puffing on fire)
it seemed all had been forgotten about
except
for
inside me
the all-consuming guilt
the horrible knowing
that my boo-boo
had a boo-boo
FROM ME!!!!!!!!

NOOOOooooooooo……
I alerted his other mother immediately, because
it's the right thing to do
no matter how embarrassing

thank god it's written now
for all the world to see

it's hard to hide a secret
i cannot
i suck at it
well, my secrets anyway
others' secrets?
not mine to tell
i'm golden like that.

someone else? secrets for them?
dunno.
money secrets
sex secrets
pay-to-say-nothing secrets
cheating secrets
other-people-wrote-it secrets
so many secrets to hide from
point to another circumstance
in hopes they'll stop looking at your secrets

laundry day, missus, laundry day.
all my love to the sheet-hangers."

[Image via WENN.]

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