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Great News! Or Maybe Bad News? A Clown Shortage Set To Hit The U.S.!

| Filed under: Wacky, Tacky & TrueSilly!Business BlitzStuff 4 Kidz

There's a clown shortage in America! Time for Fizbo power!

Send in the clowns!!!

Thanks to Fizbo, Cameron's hilarious clown alter ego on Modern Family(played by the even more hilarious Eric Stonestreet), we've learned that there are four kinds of clowns:

1. A tramp 2. Auguste 3. A whiteface, and 4. A character.

Now, if only the rest of the country would take clowning this seriously….

The reason why??

THERE'S A SHORTAGE OF CLOWNS IN AMERICA!!!

The problem isn't some sort of new problem, it's just the times. Old clowns are dying (most likely to move on to their final ghost and haunting forms to scary kids for eternity) and no youngsters really seem interested in becoming new ones.

This has caused a drastic decrease in membership at the country's biggest clown organizations over the past decade! We can't believe we seriously wrote that sentence, but it's true!

The president of Clowns of America International (really) said this:

"[Kids who are even into clowns] go on to high school and college and clowning isn’t cool anymore. Clowning is then put on the back burner until their late 40s and early 50s."

Not sure when clowning was considered cool by popularity standards, but we can understand that it probably was amongst those few who enjoyed the classic entertainment.

Here's what the president of New York Clown Alley (which is not a literal terrifying alley) said:

"American kids these days are thinking about different careers altogether."

We can't believe we're writing this stuff!

One of the biggest downfalls of being a clown, other than scaring a large portion of the population, is that they usually only make $300, at most, per birthday party performance.

The pros over at The Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus have also been making the audition process even more difficult.

Some people think there isn't a shortage at all, but rather young clowns just aren't joining the societies.

Rogue clowns. Undocumented, rogue clowns.

We can't think of anything more terrifying!

[Image via AP Images.]

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2 comments to “Great News! Or Maybe Bad News? A Clown Shortage Set To Hit The U.S.!”



  1. 1

    My neighbour is working part time and averaging $9000 a month. I'm a single mum and just got my first paycheck for $6546! I still can't believe it. I tried it out cause I got really desperate and now I couldn't be happier. Heres what I do, , MONEYJURY.COM



  2. 2

    there is definitely no shortage of "clowns" in the usa just unofficial ones is all lol