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Twilight-Inspired Erotic Fanfic Flaunts Tantalizingly Beautiful Cover

Filed under: TwilightBookz50 Shades Of Grey

beautiful bastards book cover twilight erotic 50 shades of grey

Oh, how we love a man who can pull off wearing a skinny tie!

You could say the thought makes us… Twi-Hard, LOLz!!

The novelization of the newest Twilight-inspired work of erotic fan-fiction, Beautiful Bastard, is nearly upon us and today Gallery Books unveiled the super-seXXXay cover!

YUMMY!

If their intention was to further whet our appetites wet our Team Edward panties — mission accomplished!

Part one of what authors Christina Hobbs and Lauren Billings hope will become the next 50 Shades of Grey hits bookshelves February 12, 2013.

We're guessing a Valentine's Day release is no coincidence!!

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Rumer Willis And Jayson Blair Get 50 Shades Freaky In Miami Beach

rumer-willis-pda-jayson-blair-50-shades-freed-ocean-makeout

AHEM! Keep your hands above the water, where we can see them!!

JK, you guys — we aren't your parents!!

We actually think Rumer Willis and Jayson Blair's ultra-public displays of adorbzies tongue affection (SPDATA) are cute!!

Much to the delight of onlookers, they splish-splashed in the beautiful blue waters off of Miami Beach yesterday before cuddling up in a cabana on the sand!

Ch-ch-check out more of those pics (below)!

Wait a minute, she's reading 50 Shades Freed?!

Wowiee-zowiee!

Later that night we bet their canoodling upgraded from PG-13 to XXX!

Jayson is probably cruising for an awkward conversation with her father, Detective John McClane!!

Then again, Bruce Willis participated in several steamy love scenes himself — he remembers what it's like to be young!!

[Image via Mavrix Online.]

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What The Tabs Are Talking About!

jennifer aniston ryan gosling christina aguilera sandra bullock britney spears justin timberlake jessica biel mila kunis maculay culkin star october 25 2012 magazine tabloid cover

OOOH WE JUST LOVE STUFF LIKE THIS!!

Looks like some pissed off housekeepers wanted to sell their stories to the tabs this week! And according to Star, certain celebrities are being exposed for the unimaginable!

And seeing as how the 50 Shades sex act shocker is the only one that doesn't include a female pronoun, we're gonna have to assume they're wanting us to believe that's about Ryan Gosling.

Unless of course they're being jerks and just playing with our emotions! Sometimes they can be torturous, you know…

But seriously… who the hell hides cheeseburgers under their bed?? It's not like any of these people are broke! Sounds like they're just too embarrassed… oh no, binge alert!!

And shut the hell up — what are they saying about Britney Spears and meth?? We may just have to go out and buy this fan-fiction! LOL!!

BUT ANYWAYS…

If you wanna read all about Jessica Simpson's weight issues,

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Ryan Gosling Definitely Is NOT Up For 50 Shades… Boo!!

ryan gosling 50 shades grey

OMG!! So who will it be already!?!

We need to know who to think about when we're reading 50 Shades of Grey over and over again!!!

We got really excited when we heard little rumors here and there of Ryan Gosling's potential casting in the sexy film adaptation.

But according to author E.L. James:

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Jennifer Aniston & Justin Theroux Reunite For Birthday Sex Luvin!

justin theroux jennifer aniston birthday

Ahhh… sweet, sweet love!

We're so happy Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux are still together. We knew better than to believe those blasphemous rumors!

But in case any of you were still skeptical, today is Justin's 41st birthday!! And for this year's celebration of his exit from the womb, he's meeting up with JennyJenJen down in Wilmington, NC!

She's been

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