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Nicolas Cage Keeps Emma Stone Rapt With Attention! Fill In The Blank!

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As Nicolas Cage spoke during the press conference for The Croods during the 63rd Berlinale International Film Festival Friday in Germany, Emma Stone listened intently while simultaneously thinking "___________________________________!"

[Image via Getty Images.]

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Sacha Baron Cohen To Make Flick Inspired By The $63 Million Lesbian

Sacha Baron Cohen To Make Flick Inspired By The $63 Million Lesbian

Hollywood moves at super sonic speeds!

For those of you that were in a coma (or just taking a really long awesome nap) during all of last week, this happened: A Hong Kong real estate tycoon is offering $63 million to any man capable of convincing his lesbian daughter to dump the woman she married last spring, and to enter holy matrimony with him instead.

Now, Paramount Pictures has just announced that they've hired Sacha Baron Cohen will be making this cooky story into a movie!

Tentatively dubbed The Lesbian, the film may star Baron Cohen, who will produce it through his production company. A writer has not been attached.

We're sure Mr. Baron Cohen will handle this delicate story with grace and class.

JK!!!!!!!!

But, it will most defiantly be HIGHlarioooss!

[Image via WENN/Facebook.]

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$63 Million Lesbian Daughter Of Hong Kong Dad Doesn't Appreciate 'Getting 1,500' Proposals!

Some people will do just about anything for money — even if they have to propose to a lesbian who is already married!

We told you all about the delusional dad in Hong Kong who is offering $63 million (HK$500 million) to the man who can convince his daughter, Gigi, to marry him.

Even though Cecil Chao Sze-tsung refuses to acknowledge the fact that she is currently in a civil partnership with her girlfriend of seven years, Sean Yeung(above, left), she actually isn't all that angry about his outlandish offer.

In fact, she's "touched" and explained:

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Hong Kong Father Offering $63 Million To Any Man Who Marries His (Already Married) Lesbian Daughter!

Filed under: Gay Gay GayLove LineSad SadFacebookWedding Waltz

A Hong Kong real estate tycoon is so oblivious to reality, tolerance and consideration for his daughter's feelings that he's offering $63 million to any man capable of convincing her to dump the woman she married last spring to enter holy matrimony with him instead.

Cecil Chao Sze-tsung refuses to accept the fact that his daughter Gigi eloped to France last April to marry her lesbian partner and has put the offer on the table for any "generous and kind-hearted man."

The 76-year-old prefers living in la la land over accepting the love of his daughter's life into his family, so he's calling reports of Gigi's same-sex marriage "false."

This sounds like the plot to a bad romantic comedy from the 90s, but sadly, it's completely true. Cecil calls his ridiculous offer

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Woman Becomes Pregnant 'In The Mouth' After She Eats Baby Squid

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WARNING:

The following story may turn one off from eating seafood again. Or at least calamari.

A 63-year-old woman from South Korea took her first bite of a cooked whole squid and instantly "felt extreme pain in her oral cavity." She spat out the food immediately, and complained she felt a "pricking and foreign-body sensation" inside her mouth. She was taken to the hospital.

You might be thinking it was food poisoning, right?

Here's what the hospital reported:

"Twelve small, white spindle-shaped, bug-like organisms stuck in the mucous membrane of the tongue, cheek, and gingiva were completely removed, along with the affected mucosa. On the basis of their morphology and the presence of the sperm bag, the foreign bodies were identified as squid spermatophores."

A spermatophore is a CUP OF SEMEN!!!

And there were TWELVE spermatophores inside her mouth!

Which means she had TWELVE CUPS OF BABY SQUID SEMEN inside her mouth.

The good news is that there is no chance of mouth impregnation from baby squid in the west because all of the internal organs are removed, but if you're ever in the Far East we recommend you play it safe and avoid the baby squid.

Thankfully, the woman from South Korea is A-OK. Although she's probably pretty grossed out as we most definitely are.

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Donna Summer Has Died!

Filed under: Music Minute

Details to come!

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Drew Apologizes For Fugging Up Gucci's Name

Filed under: Fashion SmashionDrew BarrymoreAwardzGucci

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It's been 4 years, but Drew Barrymore felt the need to apologize to Gucci for looking awful in one of their dresses at the Golden Globes back in 2006.

The actress said:

"My worst red carpet moment is the Gucci green dress where my boobs look like watermelons, it's the worst. Never wear a high neck dress with a high belt. It makes your t*ts look like they are at your waist. It was the Golden Globes. I felt so bad. I was like, 'I'm so sorry, Gucci. I have tarnished your name."

Better late than never. We guess.

[Image via Nikki Nelson/WENN.]

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