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7 Of The Strangest Christmas Traditions Around The World

Filed under: Holidaze

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Let's be honest… on paper, Santa Claus sounds pretty effing terrifying.

But believe it or not, some nations celebrate Christmas figures even scarier than a mystical jelly-bellied man who watches children all year long before sneaking into their homes.

Like the celebrated German goat-demon Krampus, who spends the holiday season punishing children who have misbehaved.

Sadly, not all of these bizarre holiday traditions have been given their own horror films — but you still won't want these worldly Christmas creepers climbing down your chimney…

CLICK HERE to view "7 Strangest Christmas Traditions Around The World!"

CLICK HERE to view "7 Strangest Christmas Traditions Around The World!"

CLICK HERE to view "7 Strangest Christmas Traditions Around The World!"

CLICK HERE to view "7 Strangest Christmas Traditions Around The World!"

CLICK HERE to view "7 Strangest Christmas Traditions Around The World!"

[Image via Universal Pictures.]

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Listen To This: Love, Sex, Pills, Money!

Filed under: Listen To This

Ass down, face up, that's the way he loves to….

Well, you know the rest!

FrankMusik is having an amazing 2015! The Perezcious fave as exploded as an in-demand producer this year!

The latest offering from the Brit is Double Trouble by Ray Noir.

Electroclash is alive and well!

Even though both dudes are British, they're taking us to Germany and giving us some major early 2000s vibes!

This is industrial meets pop meets Miss Kittin, Chicks On Speed and Lords Of Acid - with some DJ Assault for good measure!

Check out the hotness above!

Then CLICK HERE to listen to more music from Ray Noir!

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Listen To This: 99 Luftballons!

Filed under: Listen To This

This is a rare treat!

We don't often hear pop songs in German. The last one we can remember was from Nena in the '90s!

But Andreas Bourani has given us a big anthemic jam, which we don't understand a word of but LOVE!

We think it's meant to uplift and inspire, because that's the effect it has over us! And it will you too!

Check out Auf Uns above!

Then CLICK HERE to listen to more music from Andreas Bourani!

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German Soccer Players Do Their Best One Direction Impression As They Celebrate Their World Cup Win With Some Fierce Dance Moves!

Filed under: Silly!ZportzSoccerDanceFunnyGIFs

Germany displayed some awesome dance moves as they celebrated their World Cup win at home!

Look out, One Direction! You guys have some competition on your hands!

Germany scored some serious global bragging rights this weekend after beating Argentina in the World Cup final! But if you thought their performance on the field was awesome, wait until you see their homecoming!

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This Photo Of A Tourist Getting Stuck In A Giant Vagina Will Give Birth To Many Belly Laughs!

Filed under: Wacky, Tacky & TrueCrazzzzy

american student tourist rescued stuck giant german vagina sculpture photos

An American exchange student caused quite a stir when he got himself stuck in a huge vagina sculpture in Mainz, Germany.

It took 22 midwives rescue workers about 30 minutes to deliver the young man from the clutches of the artwork. Good thing too, because we doubt James Franco would be playing THIS guy in a movie if he had been stuck for 127 Hours!

Srsly, what got into this guy to get into the massive vajayjay??

Markus Mozer, squad leader of the local fire department, said:

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Karl Lagerfeld On "Electronic Masturbation!" Flog Your Hog On His HIGHlarious Words HERE!

karl largerfeld hates selfies electronic masturbation cara delevingne

Pinko philosopher Karl Marx, Star Trek stud Karl Urban, and fabulous fashion folk hero Karl Lagerfeld are about as different as any three men who ever lived, but if there is one thing the three Karls have in common it's their strong opinions on how the world should work!

Mr. Urban wants us all to know that he's a doctor, dammit, and not a torpedo technician!

Mr. Marx wants us to abandon capitalism and the bloated bourgeois oppressors it enables!

And Mr. Lagerfeld? Well, he wants us to know that selfies are stupid. Just plain STUPID.

While waxing poetical about Cara Delevingne recently, the great German designer took a moment to poke fun at selfies!!!

Karl lager-gushed:

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Sofia Vergara & Ellen Degeneres Took Funny And Added Some HEAVY Volume To It In This Kooky New Vid!

So much HIGHlarity, so little time!!

Sofia Vergara and Ellen Degeneres are both “easy, breezy, beautiful” CoverGirls, and have collaborated on a few CoverGirl-related things….apparently including this wacky German CoverGirl commercial!!

LOLz!

OK not really, but the two outrageously funny ladies DID get together to film a super silly version of a CoverGirl Bombshell mascara ad for Sofia's appearance on The Ellen Degeneres Show, titled "Das Bombshell".

It includes geometric costumes and props, inneresting dance moves, and great lipsyncing!

Ch-ch-check it out (above)!!

P.S. CLICK HERE to watch Sofia get a striptease during the same interview!

P.P.S. Need a Valentine's gift? CLICK HERE for some awesome ideas!

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