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Lindsay Lohan Skips Work And Her Boss Sends Christian Bale To Murder Her?!

lindsay lohan the canyons skipped adr bret easton ellis patrick bateman

Well this is a new one!

Lindsay Lohan is MIA after no-showing at work yesterday — that part isn't new — and her boss the screenwriter called her out on Twitter and… sent a fictional hitman after her!

LiLo was supposed to be in studios re-recording lines of dialogue she mumbled while filming the The Canyons, but that never happened!

Writer Bret Easton Ellis, the dude who desperately wanted to write 50 Shades of Grey and did write American Psycho, tweeted:

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Jared Leto: Manhattan's SeXXXiest Grocery Connoisseur!

jared-leto-manhattan-scarlett-johansson-whole-foods-ed-norton-christian-bale

We wish every actor aged as marvelously as Jared Leto!

It seems like just yesterday the 40 year-old film and TV star was sucking face with Claire Danes on the ABC teen drama My So-Called Life!

Maybe the nutritiously delicious grub we caught him leaving Whole Foods with in Manhattan yesterday keeps him so minty-fresh, LOLz!!

We honestly weren't sure he'd recover from being bleached-blonde and beaten mercilessly by Ed Norton in Fight Club or hacked into tiny, gorgeous chunks by Christian Bale in American Pyscho!

Scarlett Johansson knew what she was doing when she cuddle up to Jared at the DNC because he's matured into one organically tasty dish!

[Image via Buzz Foto.]

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Handcuffed And Ball-Gagged, Bret Easton Ellis Shatters Our 50 Shades Dreams

bret-easton-ellis-not-adapting-50-shades-of-grey-script sad face brown

Sad news bears!!

We thought American Psycho author and The Canyons screenwriter was truly capable of probing into the psyche of a sexually depraved business tycoon!

Alas, the only E.L. James script Bret Easton Ellis might be adapting any time soon is 50 Shades Of Bitter Disappointment!

He shared the triple-sucky story on Twitter:

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Whaaa??? Scott Disick Wanted For American Psycho Remake!

scott disick american psycho

First of all, let us just say we're SO HAPPY they're doing an American Psycho remake!

We mean, it's been sooo long since the first one came out, right? Definitely a time to revisit! LOL!!

And a little birdie just told us that Bret Easton Ellis, the author of the wall street murder thriller, actually wants Scott Disick to play Patrick Bateman!!

Here's how the tweets and comments went down:

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What?! American Psycho's Getting Remade?! Bullsh*t!

Filed under: Film FlickersChristian Bale

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Ok, you know what? This is just … unexceptable. We were on board with the movie being turned into a musical. It sounds inventive and the Spring Awakening people are behind it, so we know its going to be solid.

But

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New Deets On The American Psycho And Little Miss Sunshine Musicals!

Filed under: Music MinuteBroadway Babies

Little Miss Sunshine American Psycho Musical Adaptations Broadway

We've been keeping a close eye on the musical adaptations of American Psycho and Little Miss Sunshine, so we're pleased to tell you they're moving forward!

Both recently had readings with some VERY talented, VERY well-known actors.

Little Miss Sunshine held a private reading earlier this month, and in attendance were Tony Award nominees Raul Esparza and Sherie Rene Scott.

Word on the rest of the production details is tight-lipped!

As for

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Reese Witherspoon To Get Honored At MTV Movie Awards!

reese witherspoon to be honored by mtv

How nice!

MTV has announced that they'll be honoring Reese Witherspoon with their Generation Award at Sunday's MTV Movie Awards.

According to MTV President Stephen Friedman, she's being honored with the award for being "one of the most versatile and accomplished performers of her time."

Previous Generation Award recipients include Adam Sandler, Ben Stiller, and Sandra Bullock who received the award last year.

Thinking back, Reese has certainly been in quite a few impressive films: Pleasantville, Election, Cruel Intentions, American Psycho, Legally Blonde, Legally Blonde 2: Red, White, & Blonde, and Walk the Line!

Pret-ty impressive resume, we must say!

What do U think? Does Reese Witherspoon deserve MTV's Generation Award?

[Image via WENN.]

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