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Google Satellites Discover Christian Science Church Is Actually Giant Brown Dong! See It HERE!

Filed under: Wacky, Tacky & TrueGIFs

christian science building dixon illinois giant brown space dong google satellites

Meanwhile, in space…

We loved Gravity, but now we almost wish the plot centered around two good-looking astronauts — still played by George Clooney & Sandra Bullock — who discover Earth's giant chocolate peen while doing their space walk! Maybe it causes them to laugh so hard that they use up all of their oxygen and nearly perish!

Because, as it turns out, this big brown space sausage is actually a thing!!!

The religious elders who approved an architectural plan of a Christian Science building in Dixon, IL — get it? Dixon? Take your time, we'll wait — probably had no idea that their pretty little building would wind up looking like a perfectly proportioned replica of Wesley Snipes' enormous ebony penis (scaled 14:1) when viewed from space!

Unfortunately, a lack of foreskin foresight on their part doesn't prevent Google's satellites from picking up an aerial (money) shot of the biggest boner in all of Illinois!

Or maybe they knew precisely what they were constructing all along! Perhaps this is an offering to a benevolent God that knows the value of a good vomiting cobra when He or She sees one!

Either way, they even thought to include a thicket of pubic hair-esque shrubbery!

Oh, life! Sometimes UR too good to be true!

[Image via Google Maps.]

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Luck Will Stay With Stanford For Another Year

Filed under: ZportzFootball

Andrew Luck will play for Stanford another year

Looks like Stanford's football team may be in luck for another season.

Even though Stanford University quarterback and Heisman Trophy runner-up, Andrew Luck, was projected by many to be the first quarterback taken in this years NFL draft, he has decided to continue playing with the Cardinal for at least another season while he finishes his degree.

While many may be baffled by his decision to wait another year to earn millions, we think he's doing something pretty smart.

Luck said in a Stanford news release:

"I am committed to earning my degree in architectural design from Stanford University and am on track to accomplish this at the completion of the spring quarter of 2012."

Luck seems to be putting his eduction first, which is a good decision, considering one unlucky injury could ruin his career.

ESPN reported that the Carolina Panthers said they would take the quarterback with their first pick.

NFL rules require that underclassmen declare early whether they intend to enter the draft. January 15 is their deadline.

[Image via Getty Images.]

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