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Chris Brown's Probation For Beating Rihanna Has Been Lifted — See His Response

Filed under: Legal MattersChris Brown

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Six years after he brutally beat Rihanna, Chris Brown is off the hook — legally, at least.

A judge lifted the 25-year-old's probation on Friday, and closed the assault case stemming from the 2009 pre-Grammy attack on his then-girlfriend.

[ Related: Karrueche Tran Kicks The OWN Network Out Of Her Home ]

Chris had his probation revoked as recently as January of this year, when he left Los Angeles without permission to perform at a show in Northern California.

The decision came on the heels of a glowing report from Chris' probation officer, who, after a previous stern recommendation from the probation department that the singer serve jail time, stated that he had fulfilled his community service.

We'd like to remind you all that their previous recommendation was for Chris to go to jail!

So, not only is he NOT going to jail, he's currently OFF probation and OUT of the legal system? That's a pretty drastic change, right?

Breezy even sent out a jubilant tweet to announce the news:

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Pornhub Unveils The Wankband! Wearable Tech Allows You To Charge Your Phone By Jerking Off!

Filed under: Tech TalkBusiness BlitzSexFunnyGIFs

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The year is 2015 and fitness trackers are all the rage.

Technology has become advanced and small enough that it can track our every movement and turn it into piles of useful data.

Now, Pornhub has taken things a step further and created a device that turns our movements into energy!!

What kind of movements, you ask? Well, what kind of movement is Pornhub most likely concerned with??


Yup, they've got a new piece of wearable tech that allows you to charge your other tech just by

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Pat Bertoletti Beats Molly Schuyler (The 72-Ounce Steak Eater) To Win Wing Bowl 23!!

Filed under: FoodCrazzzzyFood Porn

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Pat Bertoletti is king of the wings!!

Wing Bowl 23 is over and a new record has been set!!

Bertoletti took the big win after eating a new record of 444 wings!! That's insane.

It was a huge upset for Molly Schuyler, who you may remember as the woman who ate two 72-ounce steaks in under 15 minutes!

She was also last year's winner and near the end of this year's competition she was actually in the lead!

[ Related: Joey Chestnut Eats 10 POUNDS Of Turkey In Ten Minutes?! ]

But Bertoletti pulled ahead in the end, beating Schuyler's wing count of 440 by 4 to take the win. The craziest part is the next closest runner-up only ate 289 wings total! That's nuts!

We guess that's why they're called "professional" eaters.

Sorry, Schuyler! Congrats, Bertoletti!! We don't envy your indigestion.

[Image via Twitter.]

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War Machine Quoted Nietzsche & Asked Ex Christy Mack To Forgive Him In His Suicide Note

Filed under: Legal MattersSad SadMMA

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Someone needs to get this guy some help.

MMA fighter War Machine savagely beat up his girlfriend Christy Mack a few months ago, after he allegedly came to her house and found her with another man.

[ Related: War Machine Believes If He Were In Texas He Could've Shot Christy Mack!! ]

He was arrested, and last week, tried to kill himself. While in his cell, War Machine wrote a suicide note, much of which was directed to Christy.

Parts of it read:

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The NFL Received The Brutal Ray Rice Video Months Ago! Didn't They Say They Never Saw & Didn't Have It?? Oh Boy…

Filed under: ZportzLegal MattersFootballCrazzzzy

roger goodell mightve seen vid a while back oh no

NFL commissioner Roger Goodell has been catching some serious flak lately, and we're starting to think it's WELL DESERVED.

After only suspending Ray Rice for two games for the brutal beating of his wife, which was a fact regardless of seeing the whole video of it, he caved under public pressure and suspended him indefinitely from the NFL after the whole tape was released.

Then, Goodell came under fire because of his apparent willingness to easily take Ray Rice back.

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