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Cross Country Flight To Philadelphia Has To Make An Emergency Landing Because Of A Dog! The Stinky Reason Will Floor You!

Filed under: TwitterDogTravel

dog poop flight

A standard jet may go around 500 miles per hour at 35,000 feet, but this dog can poop about three aisles per hour while in the air. That'll break the smell barrier!

That's right, a flight from Los Angeles to Philadelphia had to make an emergency landing because one dog kept taking dumps in the center aisle. At least three of them, actually.

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Poop Transplants Are REAL & The First Stool Bank Opens Its Gaping Hole, Uh, Doors In The U.S.A.!

poopbank

You might be thinking after reading that headline, "What the crap? Butt…butt…butt this is gross!"

Make no mistake though! Someone else's poop may save your ass, and, well, the rest of you too! Heck, one day you might just need 150ccs…of a poopsickle?

27-year-old doctoral candidate, Mark Smith, and three colleagues launched OpenBiome, the first human stool bank in the good ole U.S.A., almost a year ago, and their hard work has not gone to waste, even if they deal in it!

Honestly, we are not being feces-tious!

The poop in question has been screened, and is used to treat patients with Clostridium difficile, a gastrointestinal infection that claims the lives of over 14,000 Americans a year.

People who have Clostridium difficile suffer a lack of good bacteria in their colon as it's usually being wiped out due to taking antibiotics. The transplant helps reinstate the healthy bacteria, which then fights the Clostridium difficile.

What a steaming pile…of success!

According to a recent study, these transplants are twice as effective as regular antibiotics, and OpenBiome keeps their preparations frozen, ready to go!

Great work, guys! Now, if you'll excuse us we have to make a trip to the bank! Ew, come on, we mean the REGULAR bank!

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Another Carnival Cruise Ship Breaks Down, Overflows With Poop! Gross, Gross, Gross!

carnival cruise ship poop stranded gross overflow caribbean turds yuck

Why do people keep spending hard-earned money and precious vacation days on these floating fecal containers?!

Carnival Cruise Lines grossed out the entire planet last month by stranding thousands of unlucky souls aboard what was literally the crappiest cruise ever, but sadly their poop problems don't end there!

Another ship came to an unexpected halt in the Caribbean today, once more turning paying passengers into turd-trifling prisoners!

Ugh!! Again!?!

We aren't sure how a broken propulsion system also makes toilets overflow, but, according to those onboard, the bathroom floors were covered in human waste!

The Carnival Dream Nightmare remains stranded off the island of St. Maarten and apparently most folks are flying back to Florida from there!

As a token of their apology for their second fecal fiasco, the company refunded passengers for three of the cruise's seven days and is offering everyone discounts on future purchases.

In our humblest of opinion, that offer stinks!

[Image via 20th Century Fox.]

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Jason London Purposely POOPED His PANTS In A Police Car After Being Punched In A Bar! Check Out His Mugshot!!!

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NO WAY!!

Last time we heard from Jason London, he was enjoying his new life as a married man and now… he's defecating on himself in the backseat of a police cruiser!?

Ugh! The honeymoon is officially over!

According to a police report, the actor was bloodied and beaten in an Arizona bar before cops found him wandering Dazed & Confused through the streets of Scottsdale.

The Po-Po arrested him for disorderly conduct, fighting, and assault after he tried fighting off local paramedics.

That's when he… wait for it… PURPOSELY CRAPPED HIMSELF IN THE BACKSEAT OF A CRUISER!!!

What. The. Fudge!?!

Jason allegedly spat homophobic slurs at the cops before saying:

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Carrie Underwood & Jimmy Fallon Remember C'Rap - Country Rap! WATCH HERE!!

Jimmy… what you say… you can't CAN play basketball at the musical stylings of the long forgotten genre, Country Rap!

In fact, did you know that Carrie Underwood and Jimmy Fallon used to have a country-rap singing band in the nineties?!

Well, ch-ch-check out some old-school footage of the pair getting down-country and diRRRty with some C'rap fusion (above)!

And who knew Carrie was so well versed in rap songs?! These two totally need to reunite and release a whole NEW album of C'rap…

There is just enough C'rap in today's music world!

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