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Jack The Box Office Giant Slayer Beat Out All The Competition In Theaters This Weekend!

jack slayer box office

Sorry! If you're not an Academy Award nominated film or starring Melissa McCarthy, movie-goers just are NOT interested in watching you this year!

Well, scratch that…sort of!

Although Identity Thief has done so well that after a month of release, it's made $100 million domestically and become 2013's first blockbuster, it was bumped from the number one spot in the weekend box office by none other than Jack the Giant Slayer!

However, even though Bryan Singer's fantasy epic came in on top, it's still considered a financial flop, as it cost nearly $200 million to make and only brought in about $28 million in its premiere weekend!

OUCH!

Of course, it still fared better than The Hangover with college kids 21 and Over, which made $9 million, as well as Ed Harris and David Duchovny's Phantom, which became the 15th worst debut for a film that opened on at least 600 screens!

How bad does that make it?

The submarine thriller was released to 1,100 theaters, yet still only made $465,000!

Again with the OUCH!

In retrospect, we think the team behind Jack should be counting their blessings that they managed to make what they made! It is ROUGH out there!

Ch-ch-check out the full, abysmal box office top ten this weekend….AFTER THE JUMP!!!

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Identity Thief Steals The Weekend Box Office From Warm Bodies And Side Effects!

identity thief 1

Glad to see that one nasty, completely out-of-line review didn't detract audiences from the GLORY that is Melissa McCarthy!

Hell, even the Snowpocalypse couldn't keep movie-goers away from her!

In fact, despite all of the odds, the actress' new comedy with Jason Bateman, Identity Thief, topped the weekend box by pulling in an estimated $36.6 million…the FIFTH biggest opening ever for a non-sequel R-rated comedy!

Sadly, however, it seems that Blizzard Storm Nemo DID take a bit of a toll on the flick's business, as Universal Studios projected that had it not been for all the snow, it could have surpassed the $40 million mark!

Hey! Whatever!

It still beat out last weekend's #1 film, Warm Bodies AND Channing Tatum's latest collaboration with Steven Soderbergh, Side Effects, which respectively pulled in $11.5 million AND $10 million!

Check out the rest of this weekend's box office top ten…AFTER THE JUMP!!!

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Hansel & Gretel Take Down Movie 43…And All The Other Box Office Competition!

hansel-gretel-witch-hunters-tops-weekend-box-office

As far as the weekend box office numbers are concerned, we guess it was a case of the lesser of two evils!

WELL…maybe not evil! But DEFINITELY the lesser of two SUPREMELY shiteous movies!

While Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters was reportedly described as the "the longest 90 minutes you [will] ever spend in a theater," it still managed to make the most money across the United States by garnering the majority of ticket sales from Friday-Sunday and ultimately made around $19 million!

That's right, more folks sat through THAT then Silver Linings Playbook, Zero Dark Thirty AND Django Unchained!

Thankfully, however, the same CANNOT be said for Movie 43 and the hole in hell out of which it crawled, because even with its plethora of A-list talent that we won't further embarrass by naming here, a majority of movie-goers were smart enough to stay FAR away…resulting in a cumulative $5 million and movie reviews that refer to it as LITERALLY the worst movie ever!

OUCH!

But hey! You can find out where Jennifer Lopez's latest Parker fits in among all of thisAFTER THE JUMP!!!

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Man Arrested For Choking His Girlfriend With His Dreadlocks??

Filed under: Icky Icky PooLove LineHealth

dreadlocks choking oregon man scary wtf

We. Are. Not. Making. This. Up.

A man in Oregon has been arrested for a slew of things, including second-degree kidnapping, second-degree attempted assault, fourth-degree assault, menacing and domestic violence… because he choked his girlfriend with his super gross dreadlocks.

He was promptly booked into the Multnomah County Jail after a quick search around the neighborhood led to his arrest. As ridiculous as this is, it's still a very serious matter. Domestic violence is never a funny thing, even in this case.

We're glad this girl is okay, that she's safe and got away. We also hope she learned her lesson about dating people with dreadlocks — with hair that big, there may be more than secrets that abound!

[Image via Multnomah County Detention Center.]

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Cannibal Daughter Bites Off Mom's Thumb!

Daughter Bites Off Mom Thumb

Upper Darby, PA resident Kirstie L. Foley has been arrested for…

Ew!!! Cannibalism??

According to police, Kirstie and her mother were having an intense argument that became violent.

Kirstie attacked her mother with her teeth, biting her several times on the hands and legs, including biting a whole chuck off of the end of her mother's thumb!

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The Hobbit Has The LARGEST-EVER December Domestic Box Office Debut!

Filed under: Film FlickersBusiness BlitzBookz

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That's right, folks!

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey has beat out Avatar!

Peter Jackson's newest adaptation of the J.R.R. Tolkien classic debuted this weekend to an estimated $84.8 MILLION weekend box office, which secures it above the James Cameron sci-fi extravaganza as the largest ever domestic debut for a film released in December!

Oh, and with the $138.2 million it made overseas, the flick has made a combined $223 MILLION worldwide!

Holy SHIZ! Way to go, Gandalf!

Or perhaps we should be congratulating the much-criticized high-frame-rate format in which the film was shot, as IMAX theaters playing the film in such averaged $44,000 per screen while regular screens made $31,000!

Either way, they can only go UP from here on out!

Ch-ch-check out the full box office top ten from this weekendAFTER THE JUMP!!!

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Skyfall Reclaims Its Box Office Throne From Breaking Dawn - Part 2!

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It's official, folks!

The reign of Twilight over the box office is coming to a close!

After spending three weeks at number one, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2 finally lost its footing to not just James Bond, whose latest movie, Skyfall, made it back to the top for the first time in four weekends with $11 million, but also Rise of the Guardians, who came in second with $10.5 million after a slow start!

So where did that leave our beloved Edward and Bella?!

In the number position with $9.2 million, closely followed by Steven Spielberg's Lincoln, with $9.1 million!

We doubt the folks at Summit are TOO upset, though!

The concluding chapter to the sparkling vampire franchise has out-done both Breaking Dawn - Part 1 AND New Moon with a domestic gross of $268.7 million!

Not too shabby, Stephenie Meyer! Not too shabby at all!

Ch-ch-check out the full box office top ten this week…AFTER THE JUMP!!!

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