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We're Not Going To Lie: This Cheeto Looks Like A Dude Masturbating

Filed under: Wacky, Tacky & TrueSilly!Food

cheeto man masturbating tiny cheese dong 1

There's no way around it.

This is the most shocking revelation to ever come from a bag of Cheetos, and it's coming hard: someone found a Cheeto that looks like a man, standing up, masturbating his tiny Cheeto dong.

No joke.

Here's the NSFW pic:

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Jamie Oliver Flashes His Spotted Dick To Everyone On The Internet!

Filed under: Silly!FoodJamie Oliver

jamie oliver spotted dick food pic silly dong wang wiener 1

We'd be offended that Jamie Oliver showed thousands of people his Spotted Dick without asking if they wanted to see it, or if they were of age, but it's not really his dong. It's a dessert!

And no, we don't mean it was his 'sweet' dong either — gosh, grow up! LOLz!

Here's what he said along with posting the pic (above):

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Pauly Shore Catches You Lookin' At Pauly's Shore!!

Filed under: Silly!Etc.Beach

pauly shore small swimsuit beach dong outline gross

DAAAAAMN, Pauly Shore!!!

We think it's time for some new trunks!!

We're not positive, but something that revealing has to be posted along with other things you can't bring to the beach, like booze and glass bottles! LOLz!

Still, you're in pretty great shape for you age — we just don't want to see the outline of your dong anymore than we want to see someone get pulled under by the riptide!

Ha!

We kid, we kid. It's great to see you so healthy and active! Keep it up (but not it, you're in public)!

[Image via Pacific Coast News.]

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California TSA Felt Threatened By The World's Biggest Peen

Filed under: Wacky, Tacky & TrueEtc.

Jonah Falcon biggest penis frisked by TSA

And at 9 inches flaccid and 13.5 inches erect, who wouldn't? Ha!

Jonah Falcon is a New York-based actor and also happens to unofficially have the world's biggest dong, which could very well be official if the Guinness Book of World Records would agree to come over and measure it.

His gift from the gods has been the subject of an HBO documentary and plenty of talk shows, but most recently, was the reason for an unnecessary TSA search at the San Francisco International Airport.

In an interview after the July 9 incident, Falcon said that one guard in particular felt threatened by his "very noticeable" bulge, to which he replied:

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