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Meet Glenn Champ — The Killer, Attempted Rapist, & Prostitute Enthusiast Who Wants Your Vote For Governor Of California!

Filed under: Gay Gay GayLegal MattersPolitikSex

california gop candidate for governor glenn champ convicted sex offender manslaughter prison 10 years prostitutes evangelical christian

Nothing prepares you for running the largest state in the Union like a ten year stint in prison!

Said no one. Ever.

But don't try telling that to California gubernatorial candidate Glenn Champ!

He spent 10 years in prison after pleading guilty to vehicular manslaughter, but he really thinks he's learned to be a better person!! Some of his other past indiscretions include convictions for prostitution solicitation, carrying a concealed weapon, and two counts of attempted rape.

None of that stopped the 48-year-old convicted sex offender from asking GOP supporters for their votes at the state party's semi-annual shindig that took place earlier this month.

According to Glenn, his troubles with the law are part of the reason he's so inspired to govern. He admitted:

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Darth Vader Is Running For President Of Ukraine! Try Invading Now, Putin!

Filed under: PolitikStar Wars

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The most bad ass asthmatic in the Galaxy is invading Earth, starting in the one place that probably needs the most help fighting their own evil Empire: the Ukraine!

Okay, well sort of. The Ukrainian Internet Party is officially backing Darth Vader as their choice for the Ukraine's upcoming presidential election!

With Russian troops still amassed on the Ukraine's border (although a battalion has reportedly left), the threat of more military conflict is still great. This place is strong with the dark side of the force!

Sure, the Russians may have annexed Crimea from the Ukraine, but with this Sith lord in charge, all he'd need to do is send a couple ATATs in there, and do a little "VOOSH-VOOSH" with his lightsaber and bring balance to the place!

Meanwhile, Darth addressed the election himself in a party message:

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Donald Trump Tells FOX News He’s Thinking Of Running For Governor Of New York!

Filed under: PolitikDonald Trump

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This sounds so very familiar…

Donald Trump could soon, once AGAIN, be throwing his hat into the political ring!

The real estate and reality TV superstar teased would-be voters this morning on Fox & Friends, saying that he is thinking of running to be the next governor of New York in 2014!

Trump told the talk show panel:

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Hillary Clinton Dips Her Toe Into The 2016 Presidential Campaign Pool! Hear What She's Saying About Running Again!

Filed under: PolitikHillary Clinton

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Will she run?!

Won't she run?!

We're more than three years out from Election Day 2016 but the only question Hillary Clinton is being asked already is whether or not she'll take a second shot at the White House!

She's been pretty mum on the subject since losing to President Barack Obama in 2008. But the time for her to make a decision might be now!

Hillz spilled that she will be mulling over whether or not she wants to run for President again VERY soon! She admitted today:

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Cat Runs For Mayor Of Mexican City!

Filed under: Jessica BielPolitikDogCat

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Morris the cat isn't just your average kitty cat!

He has political aspirations!

Morris is running for mayor of Veracruz's state capital, Xalapa.

We're not 100% sure if this cat TRULY has a future in politics, but it's sure got a lot of supporters! Over 48,000 likes on its Facebook page!

The platform he's running on is

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Ashley Judd Says 'No' To Washington! She Is NOT Running For Senate!

Filed under: PolitikAshley Judd

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And we were sooo looking forward to seeing her in cleavage-flaunting power suits, too!

Ashley Judd broke the hearts of just about everyone in Kentucky this afternoon as she announced she will not be running for U.S. Senate!

The 44-year-old actress delivered the disappointing news via Twitter, promising that she'd continue to fight the good fight, but that right now wasn't the right time for her to make her run.

She admitted

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Lena Dunham LIED About Voting For Obama In The 2012 Election?!

Filed under: Oops!PolitikBarack ObamaLena Dunham

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What the what!

Lena Dunham may not have participated in the most recent presidential election DESPITE being in a pro-voting/pro-Obama PSA!!

One source claims that after some savvy digging they failed to unearth ANY records proving that the often naked Girls creator voted…

In fact, they found that a Lena Dunham registered in Brooklyn did NOT vote at all!

BUT, the controversial young millionaire actress/producer/show creator/author was in India back in November when votes were cast, so perhaps she DID vote via absentee ballot which might get officially recorded differently than regular votes.

Either way, we're sure Lena will shake this did-she-didn't-she voting scandal off and continue to regale the world with her eccentric tales of a twenty something's life in Brooklyn.

Because that is what really counts, right?

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