Bullet dodged, right bro? You almost actually had to be punished for the awful things you allegedly did to your ex-girlfriend! So lucky!!
If you couldn't tell, we're being completely sarcastic. We think it's AWFUL that Larry Johnson, former NFL running back, is getting a slap on the wrist and NO jail time for allegedly choking out his ex-girlfriend. He struck a plea deal, and it's blowing our minds how often people get away with such awful things!
His ex-girlfriend claimed he