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Joaquin Phoenix's Phunky Phacial Hair Is Phreaking His Girlfriend Out?

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Oh noes toes!

They've split! It's over! They're donezo!

Joaquin Phoenix and his shoes are never ever getting back together!

The good news? He can rebound with his bushy beard, LOLz!

The masterful actor from the The Master strolled shoeless through Venice with his lover Heather Christie on Tuesday, and we cannot help but wonder…

What the HECK was he thinking?

We've heard of walking the beach barefoot before, becoming one with the earth as the sand slips between your toes and all that jazz, but this is cray cray!

A parking lot in Venice?!

You could step on a dirty needle!

Or Ke$ha!

Regardless, Heather, Joaquin, and the funky stuff growing on his face do seem happy!

We just pray they wash those feet before getting into bed, LOLz!!

See more of the calloused couple's unfettered footsies toeing the tar (below)!

[Image via FameFlynet Pictures.]

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