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Lottery Jackpot Winner POISONED With Cyanide — The Day After Collecting His $$$!

Filed under: Icky Icky PooSad Sad

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So tragic!

After hitting the $1 mil jackpot, Urooj Khan thought the world was his oyster.

The day after the state cut him an oversized check for his winnings, the Illinois resident died! Of cyanide poisioning!

Ugh!! It's like a deleted lyric from Alanis Morissette's Ironic!

Everyone initially assumed the 46-year-old man died of natural causes, but, when an unspecified relative came forward and asked police to investigate further, it lead them to traces of the poison.

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Alanis Morissette's Still Got It…Don't You Think?

Just because she has a new album on its way (August 28) doesn't mean Alanis Morissette won't sing her classics!

One of our absolute all-time favorite Canadian songbirds proved just why she's STILL so amazing when she recently performed her iconic Ironic!

Alanis took the stage performing the track as part of

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Alanis Morissette Doesn't Want Her Baby To Copy Her Values

Alanis Morissette Doesn't Want Her Baby To Copy Her Values

She's a first time mom, but Alanis Morissette thinks she's an expert on raising a person right!

Unlike "most parents" that force their own beliefs down their children's throats, Alanis does NOT want her son share her values. Nope!

The Ironic singer and her rapper husband Mario 'Souleye' Treadway want their 11-month-old son Ever to develop his own beliefs and values while still respecting hers. Which is a concept that sounds good… in theory.

Alanis shared her views on the subject in her very deep iVillage blog. She says:

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You Can't Make This Shiz Up! Disgruntled New Jersey Folk Now Have To PAY TAXES For Jersey Shore!

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Ha! This literally is TOO HIGHlarious!

Despite many native New Jersey folk actively condemning the MTV series Jersey Shore for giving a poor representation of the lovely people that inhabit the state, its Economic Development Authority apparently approved covering $420,000 for the reality show's production costs for its first season!

LOLz! LOLz! Isn't it ironic? Dontcha' think?!

Of course, some are pretty unhappy about this amazing development, including assemblyman Declan O'Scanlon, who openly exclaimed that he can't believe that taxpayers must cough up the dough "for fake tanning for `Snooki' and `The Situation."'

Hey! Whether you like it or not, we imagine that the show has brought a serious economy boost to Seaside Heights, so we'd try to be a little more grateful for our beloved guidos and guidettes!

Just saying!

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What? Darren Criss May Star In New Film By Glee Basher

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Cue up Alanis Morissette. This is definitely ironic.

You may recall that several months ago, an author by the Bret Easton Ellis pissed off a lot of people when he compared the show Glee to a "puddle of HIV." While the comment was insensitve and cruel, it seems Bret will soon become very acquainted with that puddle as one of the Gleeks as just signed on to the new movie his adapting.

Darren Criss has reportedly signed on for

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Former President of MADD Chapter Gets Arrested For Drunk Driving!!

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This woman should be ashamed of herself!

Debra Oberlin, former president of Gainesville, Florida's MADD chapter, was arrested for driving under the influence.

As you may or may not know, MADD stands for Mothers Against Drunk Driving.

Oberlin was pulled over by police around 1 am last week after officers saw her driving erratically. She was swerving and crossing lanes before they pulled her over.

Failing a field sobriety test, Oberlin had a .234 blood-alcohol level, which far surpasses the state's legal limit of .08.

A spokesperson for MADD made a statement concerning Oberlin's arrest, saying:

"MADD is concerned to hear about the recent alleged drunk driving arrest of Debra Oberlin. MADD commends law enforcement for their efforts to keep our roads safe and are hopeful that no one was hurt as a result of this incident."

Yes, thankfully nobody was hurt. We hope this woman has learned her lesson.

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Brittany Murphy's Husband Died Of Pneumonia & Anemia…Just Like Brittany

Filed under: Brittany MurphyDrugs

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This is strange.

The L.A. County Coroner has announced that the cause of death for Simon Monjack, husband of Brittany Murphy, was acute pneumonia and severe anemia.

Five months previous to his death, Brittany also died of pneumonia and anemia, as well as multiple drug intoxication. Though the coroner found prescription medications in Simon's blood stream, there wasn't enough to be lethal.

Explanation please?

[Image via WENN.]

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