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The Hottest Stories Right Now!

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Khloé Kardashian Hints That Caitlyn Jenner Will NOT Be Introduced To Her Baby!
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Angelina Jolie's Advice For Her Daughters Will Have You Crying Girl Power Tears!
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Jamie Dornan Has A TERRIBLE Explanation For Not Showing His Dick In Fifty Shades
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Hailey Baldwin Praises Friend & New Mom Kylie Jenner For The 'Really Mature Way' She Handled Her Pregnancy!
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Jamie Dornan Has A TERRIBLE Explanation For Not Showing His Dick In Fifty Shades

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Three Fifty Shades movies later, and Jamie Dornan is STILL holding out on the goods!

After almost flashing his peen during a montage in Fifty Shades Of Grey, the 35-year-old flirted with the idea of showing his junk for realz sometime during the film trilogy.

But, as he explained to ELLE, the actor ultimately decided to keep his Dakota Johnson a mystery.

Video: Corden Goes Full Mr. Grey With Jamie In Fifty Shades Spoof!

But why?

Apparently, Dornan — and the directors — thought it wasn't necessary for the story! (LOL, "story"!? Christian Grey's dick IS the story!)

As for why the third installment Fifty Shades Freed contains 0 shades of peen, the actor said there's a lot of other eye candy to marvel over (read: his perky ass), explaining:

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James Corden Goes Full Mr. Grey With Jamie Dornan In THIS Fifty Shades Parody!

Forget Mr. Grey, we're all about Mr. Corden.

Ahead of the highly anticipated Fifty Shades Freed, James Corden collaborated with Jamie Dornan for quite the Fifty Shades parody. Ummm, AH-Mazing!

Related: Jamie Says Dakota Has "Had Quite A Lot Of Relationships"…

In the vid, rather than expose Jamie to a "red room," the chat show host reveals his dirty secret — that he's a model train collector. While the 35-year-old teases James for being a "nerd," the British comedian clarifies that he's actually a "hobbyist."

Of course, a montage of Corden educating Dornan about model train collecting ensues, but it does NOT have a happy end.

As the two actors reach their steamy climax, Jamie inquires if James plays Dungeons and Dragons. This sends the Tony winner into a blind rage, calling Dakota Johnson's onscreen lover a "sick, sick bastard"!

Be sure to watch the HIGHlarious parody for yourself (above)!

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'I Think She's A Lie': Rose McGowan CLOCKS Alyssa Milano Over Time's Up Involvement, Claims She's Connected To Hollywood's 'Pimp Problem'!
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Sarah Jessica Parker Is 'Just Heartbroken' Over Kim Cattrall Going Off Leash With The Sex And The City Hate!
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Shade Or No Shade? Jamie Dornan Says 50 Shades Costar Dakota Johnson Has 'Had Quite A Lot Of Relationships'…
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Amy Schumer On What Women Can Learn From Those Messy Aziz Ansari Allegations: 'Not Only Can You Leave, But You Need To Leave'
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Shade Or No Shade? Jamie Dornan Says 50 Shades Costar Dakota Johnson Has 'Had Quite A Lot Of Relationships'…

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We knew Christian Grey was into torture, but this kind of teasing?

Jamie Dornan was talking to Jimmy Kimmel about his "brother and sister" dynamic with Fifty Shades Freed costar Dakota Johnson when things got a wee bit shady.

Video: Jamie Put WHAT On His Penis As A Teenager??

When talking about how their own lives affected their intimate scenes, the Irishman said offhandedly:

"I'm married, and she's had… quite a lot of relationships in the time that we've known each other."

Um, what? Exactly WTF is he trying to say about Dakota's love life??

Ch-ch-check out the S&M and cock sock talk (below) then tell us if YOU think he was being shady!

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Jamie Dornan Put WHAT On His Penis As A Teenager??

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He wasn't always Christian Grey!

On Friday, Jamie Dornan appeared on the Graham Norton Show — along with Helen Mirren and Liam Neeson — where he told an interesting story about his youth.

While the 50 Shades Of Grey star is known as an international sex symbol, he was a "late developer" growing up who didn't have a lot of body hair. In fact, when he was 15, he "looked about 7."

Related: 50 Shades Fans NEED To See This Figure Skating Routine!

After performing in a school production of Anton Chekhov's The Cherry Orchard, Dornan attended an after-party and decided to make himself look manlier… down there! Using a "black, very acrylic, highly flammable wig" from the play, he recalls:

"I might meet a girl and maybe she drops a hand, so I had the idea to maybe cut off some extra hair… So I went into the dressing room, I went into like the toilet, and cut off this like very curly jet-black hair."

Once the Irish actor applied the fake hair to his crotch area, he was ready to party! Sadly, the now-35-year-old wasn't able to seal the deal with a girl he was kissing.

"Went to the party, I think I kissed a girl [and was] sort of really urging her to sort of, you know, without forcing her, urging her to sort of go down… for one night only, ’cause that seemed quite an impressive place to put your hand… Anyway, that didn't happen and actually, thank God it didn't ’cause I got home—it was a car crash down there."

To make matters worse, the removal process was "physically and emotionally" damaging, and cleared out the three "naturally developed pubes" he had!

WATCH the funny clip (below):

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Mother Of Grey! Dakota Johnson Learns She's PREGNANT In The Newest Fifty Shades Freed Trailer!

Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan are ready for their big climax in the newest trailer for Fifty Shades Freed, and that might just end with a special delivery.

Anastasia Steele Grey is finally the one giving the orders in the upcoming installation, and she won't hesitate to call the FUCK out of anyone who hits on her man (looking at you, horny architect lady).

Video: Extended First Look At American Crime Story: Versace!

But even Mrs. Grey, she-with-the-highest-pain-tolerance, can't seem to handle one delicate piece of news: she's pregnant!

Watch the latest trailer (above) for shots of sexy sex scenes, thriller-y gasps, and more real estate porn than actual. Fifty Shades Freed hits theaters on Valentine's Day!

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