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Hands Off Ladies! Michael Lohan Is Taken!

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A match made in reality T.V. HELL!!!

Ya'll know who Kim G. is, right? If not, turn on an episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey from last season. She's the one who doesn't own a store, but rather owns a whole lot of crazy. As she wasn't ask the cast formally this season, she's been finding new and exciting ways to keep her abbreviated name out there for the world to see. Today, she landed herself an interview to talk about the only thing that makes her relevant - Michael Lohan.

It's not a lot to go on, but it's the best that she's got!

Here's what she has to say about her whirlwind romance with Papa Lohan:

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Want To Party With Teresa Giudice?!

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C'mon, wouldn't you like to?! Gurl has bills to pay!

That's right, for the very reasonable price of $75 - apparently a portion of that also goes to charity - you can attend the Teresa Giudice's Season Three Premiere Party of The Real Housewives of New Jersey at the Tribecca Nightclub in Fort Lee, NJ, and not only receive an hour of free drinks and hor d'ouevres, but also an autographed picture with the reality star!

According to invite, expect "celebrity surprises," "fashion shows" and "star performances!"

Does that mean Michael Lohan and Kim G will be appearing to debut their new reality show/tanning line/new single/whatever they have planned?

LOL!

Yeah. We'll be sure to sign right up!

Good luck with that debt, gurl!

[Image via WENN.]

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Real Housewife Is Diggin' The Michael Lohan

Kim G and Michael Lohan

Kim Granatell is throwing caution to the wind, and dating Michael Lohan.

Here's how she put it:

"I just got back from making out with Michael Lohan in Florida. He's got a very big heart. He's a great guy."

Really?? That's how you tell us?? Ha!

Apparently she's been seeing the Father Of The Year since January, and she hasn't met Linds yet!

Well, we don't really know what to say. If you guys are truly happy together, then, we support you!

What do U think of these two pairing up??

[Image via WENN.]

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He's At It Again! Michael Lohan Turns Yacht Into Reality Show Rehab Facility!

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Good. Hopefully they can just keep him out there.

No need to dock! Ever!

Michael Lohan reportedly set out to sea last week off the coast of Florida, on a three-level yacht that has been renovated as a rehab facility for about two dozen people - including a camera crew, and The Real Housewives of New Jersey's official wannabe, Kim Granatell!

Oh yeah. That sounds like a healthy combination for a bunch of recovering addicts.

We'd be driven to drink upon arrival! LOLz!

Have fun attempting to sell your new reality show helping others, Michael!

[Images via WENN.]

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Real Housewives Of New Jersey's Teresa Has Some Pretty Shocking Feelings About Danielle!

WTF?!

This is it. Hell has frozen over. The end is coming.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey's Teresa Giudice recently sat down to discuss what's coming up next season on the smash Bravo reality series, and when asked about her nefarious former co-star Danielle Staub, she had a pretty SHOCKING response!

Ch-ch-check it out (above)!

We appreciate the sentiment, bb, but personally, we're going to have to disagree with you!

Unless producers have found someone even WORSE (dare we say Kim G?!) to succeed her, if that's possible!

Ugh. This is all a little too unsettling.

We suppose we'll know the answer soon enough.

Thoughts??

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