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Justin Bieber Cleared Of Hit-And-Run Charges By LA County DA!

Filed under: Legal MattersJustin Bieber

justin bieber cleared hit and run

Beliebers, you can all breathe easy now!

Justin Bieber is in the clear! The Los Angeles County District Attorney has rejected the star’s hit-and-run charges!

The case revolved around a paparazzo claiming that JB had gotten WAY too close to him upon leaving a West Hollywood nightclub last month before allegedly fleeing the scene.

Though Justin had previously been cleared by LAPD, the DA was asked to give the case a look over, only to come to the same conclusion. According to prosecutors, there was “"insufficient evidence to prove that Bieber knowingly left the scene of a collision in which someone was injured."

PHEW! Close one, Biebs!

Now, please, please, please stay out of trouble!

[Image via Judy Eddy/WENN.]

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Voters Strike Devastating Blow Job To El Lay Porn Industry!

Filed under: Yummy Yummy ScrewR.I.P.PolitikTwitter

porn legislature passed los angeles condom required

Ruh-roh! El Lay might need to change it's nickname!!

As Barack Obama won four more years, marriage equality found major breakthroughs, and pot smokers rejoiced by binging on Cheetos, Los Angeles Country residents voted in new law specific to the porn industry!

Measure B requires porn companies to purchase more expensive safety permits and forces condom use in sex scenes. It passed, with 55.9% of voters supporting it.

YAY! Safe sex is good, right? …Right???

Of course safe sex is good!

The problem with this measure, argues the porn industry and the L.A. Times, is that porno films are already safe!

Strict screening measures exist to ensure that no participants are infected with STDs!!

All this measure does, they say, is add (unnecessary) condoms!

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