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Lindsay Unveils New Mugshot!

Filed under: Lindsay Lohan

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Taken Friday morning.

CLICK HERE for all the latest Lohan news!!!

At least she didn't smile in this mugshot!

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AMAZING. Michael Lohan Produces A Song For Lindsanity!

This is ACTUALLY better than Christmas!

It's always been abundantly clear that Michael Lohan is a man of many talents - he is an expert wife beater, an unrelenting famewhore, and of course, a delusional ex-con, but we never knew that he was also a nuanced song-writer!

We beg you to PLEASE listen (above) to a Poppa Lohan penned instant classic, A Father's Love, allegedly written in honor of his beloved meal-ticket Lindsanity while he was behind bars, himself.

Unfortunately, it appears that Michael has not contributed his own vocal stylings to the stunning piece, but we hope that when his little princess is released from Lynwood, he'll be waiting for her outside blaring this classic from a ghetto-blaster a la John Cusack in Say Anything!

Her anger and resentment over years of abuse, exploitation, and neglect would melt away!

LOLs!

Thoughts??

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Lindsay Will Be In The Slammer For The Rest Of July!

Filed under: Lindsay LohanLegal Matters

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No release this week!

The LA County Sheriff's Department revealed that Lindsay Lohan will NOT be released this week after all.

She still may only end up serving 13 days of her sentence. However, due to overcrowding at Lynwood, she could be released as early as Sunday, August 1.

And then rehab will welcome her with open arms!

[Image via AP Images.]

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Lindsay Is NOT Going To Like THIS News!

Filed under: Lindsay LohanLegal Matters

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Somebody get her the psychiatric evaluation STAT, because gurlfriend is going to absolutely go EFFING NUTS when she hears this!

Once Lindsanity LOLhan gets thrown behind bars, the hard-pAArtying wacktress is apparently going to have some pretty intense restrictions (at least for her) in the Lynwood, CA jail - where she is expected to do her time!

Cosmetics and hair extensions are reportedly banned, as well as smoking!

Oh shiz! Those are like her three favorite things!

Well…other than drugs and booze and making excuses! Bwa ha ha!

That being said, we can't wait to see what she looks like after two HOURS in prison, let alone 90 days! Poor thing is going to be catatonic from withdrawal!

She's gotta learn somehow! Good luck bitch!

Thoughts??

[Image via AP Images.]

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