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Shakira Sues Blackmailers!

Filed under: Music MinuteLegal MattersShakira

Shakira Sues

Whatever reason Shakira had for firing two employees recently, she has a better one now!

The longtime employees tried to extort money from the Colombian hip-shaker, threatening to air her dirty laundry unless she paid them a half million dollars!

Shakira may not be from the U.S., but she plays by our rules; the Latina superstar does not negotiate with terrorists!

Instead of paying, the singer is striking back with

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U2 Bassist's Assistant Caught Embezzling!

U2 Bassist Adam Clayton

Achtung, Baby! Theft could happen to U2!

Carol Hawkins, personal assistant to U2 bass player Adam Clayton, has been found guilty of embezzling funds from the rocker.

Hawkins apparently moved in mysterious ways for over 4 years of her service; she was convicted last week of 181 counts of theft totaling nearly 3.5 MILLION dollars! It's NOT alright!

The thief will be where the streets have no name and the windows have bars for 7 years.

Clayton is reportedly pleased with the verdict, and will carry on rocking with or without Hawkins.

[Image via Dominic Chan/WENN.]

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Ryan Phillippe Srsly Wants To Move Out Of This House

Ryan Phillippe CANNOT Get Rid Of This House

Ryan Phillippe is DESPERATE to ditch his house in the Hollywood Hills!

It's been two years now that Ryan has been trying to unload his lavish bachelor pad that he moved into following his divorce from Reese Witherspoon in 2008.

In an act of desperation, Ry has reduced the asking price for his bachelor pad from $7.45 million to $6.9 million dollars.

The place cost him $7.1 million when he moved in, but it appears he's willing to loose a chunk of change to move somewhere else.

Here's some info for those of you invested in purchasing the property (for a steal!). Aside from being awesome, the 7,500 square foot residence boasts

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Evander Holyfield Sells His House For $7,500,000!

Filed under: Sad SadBusiness BlitzBoxing

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Normally, if we told you former boxing star Evander Holyfield sold his house for $7.5 million dollars, we'd be impressed and congratulating him.

Except the house sold in a public auction and it's not even that much… he owes the bank twice that number!!

He also owes over $200,000 in back taxes.

His amazingly huge mansion is 54,000 sq. ft on 234 acres.

That's unbelievable.

No one needs that much space. Then they don't have to worry about running into $14 million problems like this.

Best of luck paying your debts, Evander!

Maybe he should get back in the ring for a multimillion dollar exhibition!

[Image via Curtis Sabir/WENN.]

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Oregon Woman Gets Herpes…And Then Gets Rich!

Oregon Woman gets massive settlement for herpes lawsuit

Herpes isn't all bad. As long as a judge awards you with $900,000 for getting it.

A 49-year-old Oregon woman filed a lawsuit against a 69-year-old dentist who accidentally gave her herpes. We say "accidentally" because he didn't think she'd get it. However, he didn't bother to tell her about his unpleasant condition before they banged and didn't bother wearing a condom either. So really, he's just the worst health care professional ever.

The defendant contended that he is not at fault because his eHarmony date

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Octo-Mom Files For Bankruptcy…And Is Considering Porn!

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Lights, camera, action!

Octo-Mom, who's been struggling to support her fourteen children, has had a change of heart in regards to her future in the porno business.

It might have something to do with the fact that she just filed for bankruptcy.

That's right.

Nadya Suleman filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy in court today. Chapter 7 is the most serious form of bankruptcy and basically means the mom is dead broke.

But that could all change if she's willing to bump uglies and star in a porno flick.

Here's what Octo-Mom said:

“You know if the opportunity comes up I'll be the first to admit, I’m gonna eat my words! Because all that matters is that I can take care of my family. If it's a job, and it's a well-paying job, and it's gonna allow me to get out of here and move [my kids] into a very safe, huge home that they deserve … I'm gonna do it."

In the past Octo-Mom had been adamant she'd never ever appear in a adult movie, and she backed up those words when she turned down a million dollar offer to become a porn star.

But it has been all downhill for her since rejecting the lucrative deal.

She's been unable to pay her mortgage and her house is set to be auctioned next Monday.

One has to admire her desire to help her children, but we're not exactly sure this is the correct way to go about that.

What will her children think?

What will we think about Octo-Mom in porn?

We don't want to think about it, actually.

Although, we have to admit, there are some amazing title possibilities for an adult film with Octo-Mom.

Like…

Actually, forget we mentioned that.

[Image via WENN.]

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A Ticket To Mars Will Cost More Than You Can Handle

Filed under: Wacky, Tacky & TrueFitnessScience!

Mars Trip

Do you REALLY want to go to Mars?

Well, unless you have $500,000 you're shizz out of luck!

That's a LOT of money! Holy crap!

Elon Musk says SpaceX is developing a plan for trips to Mars that will

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