You know, making the world's smartest humans look like simpletons on national television is one thing, computers….but now you are screwing with an American pass-time!
We don't like this at all!
Introducing Monopoly Live, the newest edition of America's favorite way to waste 13 hours of their lives. The rules are the same as they always were, but in this new age, people apparently shouldn't be bothered to do things like roll dice or count change. Heavens no! That's why Hasbro unveiled a new technology - a new computer - that will do all the work for you!
See that tower in the middle of the board there? That wonder stick keeps track of all your money, rolls the dice for you and it even knows where your doggie lands on the board. No more Chance or Community cards, everything is done by that Shake Weight magic cylinder. With a wave of one hand, you can buy Park Place and with a wave of the other, you can say goodbye to cheating your Grandma out of all the Railroads. This super computer will have none of those shenanigans.
Check out the video (above) to see Monopoly Live plot its world domination in action.
Do not pass GO, Lindsay Lohan. Do not collect $200. Do not spend time with your family.
As far as Monopoly references are concerned, we all know Lindsay doesn’t need $200, and she’d probably just swerve wildly around GO, but she does need to spend time with her family.
As Lindsay finishes up her final week in jail, she’s not too happy about the prospect of making the transition to rehab within 24 hours of her release. Here’s what her attorney, Shawn Chapman Holley, had to say on the subject:
"She’s a little upset right now. She'd like to spend some time with her family, and there’s at least some question as to whether or not she’ll have to go directly to rehab."
With zero all due respect Lindsay, you’re in jail. It’s perfectly normal for you to be upset. And don’t worry, you’ll have plenty of time to see your family after your rehab sentence and before your next prison sentence.