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Teresa Giudice Writes Another Bargain Bin Cookbook

Filed under: Reality TV

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Make sure you pick it up the next time you are in Costco! (That's not a joke.)

Teresa Giudice of The Real Housewives of New Jersey is still up to her guidette neck in debt and with her hubby just spending some quality time behind bars, its up to her to get the family back on track.

So she wrote a second cookbook called Skinny Italian: Eat It and Enjoy it - Live La Bella Vita and Look Great Too! Now, you too can cook like a fiery Italian who hates prostitution whores and flips tables to accentuates your fury.

Costco will be exclusively carrying the book (see?) and from what we've heard, the book is pages and pages of Teresa "trying to hard" to be cute, but offering some pretty decent Italian ideas.

The book comes out on May 4th, which we will wager will be around the time the new season of Jersey Housewives will start up.

Call it a hunch!

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EXPLOSIVE New Testimony About Prostitution Whore's Past! Drug Cartel Wanted Her DEAD After She Screwed Them Out Of $100k!

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This is getting completely out of control.

Everyone knows that former Real Housewives of New Jersey castmember Danielle Staub was a drug-addicted, psychopathic prostitute who, but according to court documents regarding the $5 million defamation suit filed against her by former husband Kevin Maher, she was involved in such a bad drug ring that she nearly got herself killed by the notorious Medellin cartel!

Daniel Aguilar, who knew Danielle when she was a Miami prostitute in the 80s living under the name Angela Minelli, revealed under oath that she began hanging around his house, while he was working as an "enforcer" for the drug suppliers, and watched her do cocaine "more than 50 or 100 times."

He explains:

"We became intimate friends… she would do her drugs… and sometimes I'd wonder was she hanging out for the drugs, which most girls back then did. She started talking about, you know, 'I need to get money. I need money to do things. So she came to me and she says, 'I have this guy and he wants to buy big weight… four kilos of cocaine."

He agreed to let her do the deal, which of course, according to her, went bad, and she came back without $100,000 worth of blow claiming she'd been "ripped off."

He continued:

"Even my men were saying, 'We should just kill her. Get her out of the way. She's nothing but a prostitute and a bitch.' I cared about this woman at the time and I believed her at this point. I didn't want her life to end… I still thought that it was going to work out."

However, as we all know, the FBI intervened and that's when Staub turned her back on Aguilar, and was spared jail time for her testimony against the cartel. Aguilar, who ended up going to jail for nine years, covered her missing $100k because he still thought he loved her, which ultimately spared her life!

The deposition goes on:

"I was told by my people that she was dead. My people are my cartels. Her life was about to end. (I'm told) she's flipping (and) turned federal witness… that's when my people wanted her dead; they had called me weak for letting her live… (and) they told me, we should have had her dead to begin with. What I did was to protect her, protect me. Ain't nobody that stupid enough to make themselves publicly known after doing what they did."

Holy shit!

We've heard a lot of fucked up things about this woman's life, but…wow. This definitely takes the cake!

Uh-oh, Prostitution Whore! It's all coming out now!

Thank goodness Bravo got rid of her when they did!

We cannot wait to hear what she has to say for herself during HER deposition in October!

Shiz is going to be EXPLOSIVE!

[Image via WENN.]

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Prostitution Whore Is Getting A Taste Of Karma!

Filed under: Love LineReal Housewives

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Uh-oh! Things are going from bad to worse for Prostitution Whore!

The former Real Housewives of New Jersey castmember has reportedly been left without a car and without a lesbian girlfriend for attention!

Sources close to Danielle Staub report that baliffs showed up last weekend to repossess her Range Rover - you know, the one that she wreaked havoc in while riding around Franklin Lakes, like the Wicked Witch of the East on her broomstick!

The insider claims:

“You should have seen the begging. Danielle pleaded with the repo guys but they had their job to do, and they did it.”

To make matters worse, there are also claims that 'Lesbian WhatsHerFace Superstar' Lori Michaels has been cheating on Prostitution Whore with a back-up dancer named Courtney Lynch!

Sources reveal:

“Danielle is crazy about Lori, but doesn’t know she’s seeing another woman. Lori is a proud, openly gay woman, and the relationship with Danielle is just an amusing sidetrack for her. She’s really with Courtney. And if Danielle expects something serious and long-lasting with Lori, she’s going to end up being one heartbroken housewife.”

Ha! We guess all of this bitch's psychotic crazy is finally catching up with her!

What, did you not make enough ca$h off of your 'tortured lullaby' to make your car payments on time, bb?

Sucks, bitch! But we're sure all of that 'love and light' you preach will get you through, won't it?!

LOLs!

[Image via WENN.]

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Prostitution Whore's Ex Is Coming For Her!

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Uh-oh! It looks like she's going to get what's coming to her this time! Shit is getting real!

Former Real Housewives of New Jersey's Prostitution Whore is in the middle of a nasty legal battle with her ex-husband, Kevin Maher, who is none too pleased about the allegations the sociopath has made about him, and is suing her for defamation!

As we've reported, Danielle Staub has claimed that Maher killed her dog, shoved a gun in her cooter, and raped her on a bed of glass.

She filed a motion earlier in the week asking the judge to exclude "any evidence that the Defendant was a prostitute, or a stripper, or is promiscuous, or has been featured in sex tapes," but Maher has had enough, and is ready to fight to prove that his ex is a pathological liar!

He reveals:

"Since this woman put these serious rape and molestation charges against me, [information about her past] is relevant…What this woman has done to me…I can't even describe how she has ruined my life. She's without conscience. She lied from day one and I'm going to prove that she's a pathological liar. She's been ducking and hiding from her deposition since this lawsuit has been filed. Oct. 5 will be the worst day of her life, when she is confronted under oath with all her lies. She's going to be destroyed."

Oh shiz!

Those are some fighting words!

If he wants to prove that bitch is a pathological liar, why don't they just show the judge the last season of Real Housewives?

That'd be proof enough for us to award this guy $5 million!

LOLs! But we're VERY much looking forward to seeing this monster try and squirm her way out of this deposition! We have a feeling this is going to be TEN TIMES more ridiculous than every episode of the reality show combined!

What do U think?? Team Prostitution Whore or Team Ex??

[Image via WENN.]

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Prostitution Whore On Maury! And NOT Why You'd Think!

Now where's the part where he cuts her mic and tells her that she's being sent to a boot camp for troubled psychopaths?

Check out (above) evil Real Housewife Prostitution Whore warble her way through the pop remix of her 'smash' single Real Close with her girlfriend for attention, the alleged 'lesbian superstar' - seriously, had anybody heard of this bitch? - Lori Michaels on Maury!

YES, she's singing on Maury!

If she won't go away forever, would she at least have mercy on our ears and stop trying to SING?

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It's Actually Happening! The Prostitution Whore Show IS In The Works!

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Somebody in this world is crazier than she is.

That's the only way to explain this fuckery!

Hell has frozen over and the world is about to implode, because the Prostitution Whore herself, Danielle Staub, actually HAS a reality show in the works for Wealth TV, called Social! - yes, the exclamation point is part of the title.

BARF.

Described as a reinvented Life Styles of the Rich and Famous, the series will follow Prostitution Whore through her supremely elegant life, hosting parties, attending strip clubs fine events and visiting the homes of married men she sleeps with friends!

Creator Cary Sandoval, who has yet to realize that he's made a deal with the devil, explains:

“It’s a phenomenal show and people are excited to have Danielle. [We want to] incorporate the fact that she’s an international socialite. Danielle is an absolute sweetheart. They’re going to see the show as a polar opposite to what she was portraying on Real Housewives. We hope to raise awareness [for various charities] and give back to the community.”

HA. Suuure.

We're actually sort of excited to see this disaster come to fruition! Can't U just imagine this psycho parading herself around as though she's a legitimate clASS act?

Eh, who are we kidding? They'll realize the depths of her insanity two hours into filming and fire her ass faster than you can say "Then my daughters don't have a mother! Then are they happy?! Then are they happy?!"

Thoughts?? Will U watch The Prostitution Whore Show??

[Image via WENN.]

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The Prostitution Whore Show!

Filed under: Silly!Real HousewivesReality TV

Oh em fucking gee! Do our eyes deceive us?! There is no way! Is Prostitution Whore in on the joke that is her life?!

Check out the clip above of this HIGHlarious 'preview' of one of the many Danielle Staub's 'proposed' reality TV spin-offs, Don't Staub Believin'!

We know. We hate to admit it, but credit must be given when credit is due. You were pretty hysterical here!

But don't think this gives you a free pass, bb!

We know the devil has many faces - even one that pretends to be the self-aware butt of the joke.

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