And because fate is unrelentingly cruel on occasion, he has revealed that he plans to terrorize the west coast permanently!
In true Lohan fashion, Michael has chosen to speak to the press instead of worrying himself with where he's going to live, and he took the opportunity to explain that although his daughter doesn't want to see him right now, he feels that as she goes through outpatient rehab, that attitude could change!
And it wouldn't be an interview without him taking a dig at Orange Oprah!
"If wedges hadn't been put between us and people didn't use children as pawns, a lot of the problems suffered by children wouldn't happen."
Or maybe if you didn't whore your children out, exploit their lives for personal gain, and be an all around abusive monster, a lot of problems suffered by children wouldn't happen, either!
[Image via WENN.]