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Forget Transformers! How Many Millions Of Twitter Users Are Robots In Disguise?!

Filed under: Tech TalkTwitter

twitter user robot automated millions

Forget Skynet! The machine led apocalypse may start in the world of Twitter! #HELPUSJOHNCONNOR

Okay, so perhaps we're overreacting, but we were shocked to find out that roughly 23 million Twitter user accounts are automated.

For those tech laypeople out there, automated means they're not human (CUE: Terminator soundtrack)!

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President Barack Obama Plays Soccer With A Robot In The Ultimate Man VS. Machine Challenge! Watch HERE!

Filed under: ZportzBarack ObamaTech TalkScience!SoccerTravelGIFs

President Barack Obama plays soccer with a robot during a visit to Japan!

Either this is a trailer for an upcoming Terminator movie, or President Barack Obama is ACTUALLY playing soccer with a robot!

Based on the fact that Arnold Schwarzenegger is nowhere to be seen, we think we're going to have to go with the second option!

Obama has been busy overseas as he embarks on a weeklong tour of Asia, and during his stay in Japan he made his way to the Miraikan Science Expo in Tokyo where he got a chance to meet a robot named

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That Wedding You Want To Skip? Now You Can Send A Robot To Do Your Congratulating, Dancing, & Drinking!

Filed under: Wedding WaltzGIFs

robotwedding

Now we have an answer for how you'll survive attending that wedding where your ex will also be in attendance!

The robot apocalypse as foretold in The Terminator films may be a lot more adorable than we could have possibly imagined!

That's right, apparently there are now robots that can officiate your marriage, bare your rings, and even livestream the ceremony!

No word yet on whether or not these bots will stop the ceremony at some point and drone "ERROR! ERROR! WHAT IS LOVE? INVALID VARIABLE! MUST KILL ALL!"

Using an app, guests who couldn't make the wedding can now operate these robots remotely. They can talk with other guests, dance, and even order a drink!

Because nothing is more enjoyable than having a robot pour alcohol on itself in place of actually attending your friend's wedding!

Also, what if it at some point the robot develops a relationship with the groom ala the movie Her? Also, is there some place we can sign up to be a surrogate?

Well, looks like you finally won Skynet! Guess we'll have to wait for Neo to free us from the machines! That all happens in one movie right?

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Robot Handjobs Are Real & They Look AH-MAZING! Let Science Virtually Varnish Your Flagpole HERE!

Filed under: Wacky, Tacky & TrueScience!Sex

robot handjobs are real

Finally! Science we can stick our penis inside!

We've seen a glimpse of the future, folks, and let us be the first to tell you it is GLORIOUS!

A Japanese company specializing in virtually reality recently joined forces with one that specializes in sex toys and the fruits of their collaborative effort just changed civilization for the better!

Meet the VR Tenga. It's part mechanized penis holster, part virtual reality experience, and part gift from God.

It's as simple as switching on the device, selecting a program called "Alexander_Skarsgård_bicurious_adventure_06.exe", and sticking your wang inside!!!

Ch-ch-check out the VR Tenga in action, milking a dude's manatee in a very NSFW video from a Tokyo game conference……AFTER THE JUMP!!!

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Bill Nye Booted Off DWTS As Science Lets Him — And The World — Down

Filed under: TV NewsSad SadDancing With The StarsDance

We are SO disappointed in science right now!!

Billy Nye was one of our favorite contestants this season on Dancing With The Stars, and it was mostly because we absolutely love who he is outside of the show — it's just a shame that for some reason they kept thinking it was necessary to push the science thing for his dance routines!

He should've been breaking OUT of that shell, but because he didn't, we're sad to say that's the first way science let him down.

The second way was when Bill injured his knee: he just wasn't as mobile as he should have been, and they tried their best to hide it with his robot dance (above). It's a huge bummer, and we expected more from science after the injury — what, no healing contraption? No bionic suit??

COME ON, SCIENCE! Bill has done so much for you throughout these years! You owed him!!

Oh well. Now he can get back to inventing a new species or figuring out how to terraform Mars or whatever he actually does!

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One Direction Teddy Bear Aimed At Kids Sings About One Night Stands!

Filed under: Music MinuteCute!One Direction

The perfect gift for the young Directioner tween in your life??

Uh, maybe not.

Although this One Direction teddy bear from the Build-a-Bear Workshop may be super cute and look kid-friendly, it actually dances around to one of their biggest hits, Live While We're Young, which just so happens to be about a one-night stand!

Ha!

In case you're not 1D's biggest fan, here are just some of the lyrics of LWWY:

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Texan's J.J. Watt Helps Cancer Patient Get An NFL Surprise!!

Filed under: InspirationHealthFootballCancerCute Kidz

One of the best parts of being a football star probably has nothing to do with actually playing the sport — it's probably inspiring fans, especially youngsters who want to grow up to be like you!

That's definitely the deal with Texans star J.J. Watt, who surprised one of his fans after he learned the young cancer patient had named the robot he uses for school after him!

Such a heartwarming story! You gotta watch it for yourself (above)!

The surprise is SO adorable!

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