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More Excuses From Lindsanity! Did Her Favorite Tea Set Off Her SCRAM??

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We have to hand it to her - these excuses are getting more and more creative!

Lindsanity LOLhan has been spotted recently chugging bottles of Kombucha tea, which reportedly contains .5% of alcohol.

Now that the hard-pAArtying wacktress may be in serious shiz for her probation-violating, SCRAM tampering antics on the night of the MTV Movie Awards, she and Orange Oprah have been kicking their usual laundry list of delusional excuses into hyperdrive, but this one might take the cake!

Orange Oprah herself Sources are suggesting that Kombucha tea has more alcohol in it than the label states!

Well isn't that convenient? That MUST have been what her SCRAM bracelet detected in her system, not that spilled vodka redbull she was licking off the floor of the ladies room bathroom!

G.T. Dave, the President and CEO of GT's Kombucha, isn't taking any of this bullshiz, however, and says:

"Although we are not familiar with the technology or sensitivity of SCRAM bracelets, we think it would be highly unlikely that our products would trigger an alarm. After conversations with Whole Foods we share a concern around potential labeling issues related to slightly elevated levels in some Kombucha products. In order to ensure regulatory compliance, we are supporting Whole Foods Market with the temporary removal of all Kombucha products in bottles on tap from their stores at this time."

Poor La Loca!

Now that you're trying to blame your tea, it's not going to stocked anymore! Guess you're going to have to go back to taking shots of hand sanitizer and hope that doesn't set off the bracelet, either!

Good luck, bb!

[Image via WENN.]

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Lindsanity Tampered With Her SCRAM Bracelet! Had A .04 Alcohol Level In Her System!

Filed under: Lindsay LohanLegal MattersBusted!

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We knew it! Girlfriend is one sneaky, resourceful little trainwreck!

Despite Lindsanity LOLhan apparently having a clean urine sample - used to prove her innocence the night her SCRAM bracelet maaagically went off - new reports are confirming that the device detected .04 alcohol level in her system, and then was tampered with!

A source confirms:

"There was absolutely no doubt that Lindsay was drinking, and the report that the alcohol monitoring service provided to Judge Revel was very detailed and extremely reliable. The (SCRAM) report also says that Lohan's SCRAM bracelet had indeed been tampered with, and this is one of the reasons that Judge Revel determined that Lindsay violated terns of her bail."

The time of the urine test will be compared to the SCRAM data in the hard-pAArtying wacktress' probation violation hearing on July 6, and because the alcohol-monitoring device is apparently much more reliable than peepee, if the stats don't match up, gurl is EFFED!

We are certainly curious to see how this all plays out! And, of course, eagerly awaiting a laundry list of excuses from La Loca and Orange Oprah!

We can hear it now! "It wasn't me - It was my ex-father who made my SCRAM bracelet detect alcohol in my system!"

LOLs!

What do U think they'll say this time??

[Image via Fame Pictures.]

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Lindsanity DIDN'T Have Alcohol In Her System!

Filed under: Lindsay LohanLegal Matters

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We're shocked!

Lindsay Lohan submittted a court-ordered urine sample just a few hours after her SCRAM bracelet went off on June 7 and the results came back negative!

A source reveals:

"They did a urinalysis through Medtox labs and it was indicated conclusively that there was no alcohol in her system at that time. She was ordered to go right in and today just got report back and it was negative."

Well done, Lindz!

For once your excuses were legit!

[Image via WENN.]

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Lindsay Leaving La La Land???

Filed under: Lindsay LohanAliana Lohan

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We should be so lucky! (But we're not, so we're not holding our breath!)

Lindsay Lohan is telling folks she wants out of El Lay for good, complaining that the people are just so "disgusting." While at the MuscleMilk Light fitness retreat this weekend with her sister Ali, she told friends that she would like to move to New York or even London to escape the Hollywood scene.

Then, hours later, she was spotted heading to a private birthday bash in Hollywood around 1:30 a.m. to mingle with all those "disgusting" people she just can't wait to get away from.

Boo-hoo, LiLo! You've just got it so rough, don't you?!

Any chafing from the SCRAM bracelet yet? We're sure there had to be some rubbing after you "spilled" on it!

[Image via WENN.]

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Orange Oprah Is Caught Lying!

Filed under: Lindsay LohanDina Lohan

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The enabler has been caught in a lie!

Dina Lohan blamed a spilled drink for setting off her daughter Lindsay Lohan's SCRAM bracelet, but turns out that's impossible!

A spokesperson for SCRAM explains:

“The bracelet could get an alert for alcohol spilling on the bracelet. However, SCRAM can easily tell the difference between exposure to alcohol around the bracelet and actual consumed alcohol that metabolizes through the skin.

“A spill or something else in the environment with alcohol (hairspray, lotions) would create a rapid spike much faster than the body would ever consume alcohol and would evaporate and burn off much faster than the body can metabolize alcohol.”

“Our confirmation process includes an evaluation that ensures there is no chance that an alcohol alert is anything but consumed alcohol. We’ve tested hundreds of products over the years to ensure that nothing can mimic the results of consumed alcohol—including this scenario.

Let's see what kind of "proof" the LOLhans come up with now — you know they'll never stop trying to beat the system!

Stoopid!

[Image via WENN.]

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Linsanity Considering Celebrity Rehab Apprentice

Filed under: TV NewsLindsay LohanDonald Trump

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Donald Trump sure knows how to goose ratings - or at least try to!

According to Lindsay Lohan’s mother: "The show’s producers have approached Lindsay to appear in the next season. She's deciding if she wants to do it or not, but she currently has three films in production, so she's very busy."

Between her filming, court-appearances, arrests, partying, and making excuses for why her SCRAM bracelet detected alcohol, we’re sure she has time to grow up and pretend to hold a job - NOT.

The Donald better hold off on signing any contracts until its confirmed that Lohan won’t be sporting the orange jumpsuit.

A Celebrity Apprentice from jail??

Hmmm…that could be inneresting.

[Image via WENN.]

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Lame Excuse! Orange Oprah Continues Enabling Lindsanity

Filed under: Lindsay LohanDrugsLegal MattersDina LohanAwardzSad Sad

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Excuses, excuses!

Now that Lindsanity has effed up the terms of her probation in only three weeks, it's no surprise that the entire Haus of LOLhan is going into damage control mode!

And who better to start the long, coke-fueld trip down the river of denial than her number one enabler, Dina?!

Orange Oprah says:

"She was at the MTV Awards and somebody spilled a drink on her leg, which must have set off the SCRAM bracelet. She has done absolutely nothing wrong and shouldn't have to wear the bracelet in the first place. She is doing absolutely fine."

Yes, yes.

And someone just keeps shoving cocaine up her dainty little nose, and the devil made her hijack that car in 2007, too!

Poor LiLo! How can she own up to her actions when the WORLD is just sooo out to get her?!

LOLz! What an effing joke.

[Image via WENN.]

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