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Brangie's Secret Wedding Happened Forever Ago? What The Tabs Are Talking About!

angelina jolie brad pitt wedding ok magazine april 2013(1)

You guys… obviously Angelina Jolie lied when she said she wasn't married yet. CLEARLY those were some shenanigans. ;)

Luckily, OK says they have the deets behind the super secret ceremony (that apparently happened ages ago) and why they don't wanna tell us JACK!

We're sure it has something to do with the fact that it's an intimate affair and how they don't really owe the public anything… even if it's the public who purchases tickets to see them in the moviez!

AHEM… ANYWAYS!

Yep, the tabs are STILL all about dem Kardazzians! They love 'em more than Ryan Seacrest!

But it's more of a tough love you see, because they're still pitting sisters against each other, calling Khloe Kardashian the "sexy one" now that Kim has put on her baby weight.

Some day the tabs should join forces and make a coffee table book with all the Kardazzian kovers they've done. That would probably take a lot of narrowing down, but we've got faith in 'em.

MOVING ALONG…

As usual, People keeps it classy. Cory Monteith is going to rehab, and they didn't even plaster it as the main story on their cover. Maybe not the smartest business move, but a sweet one!

Oh, what?? You somehow missed all of that? No worries — just

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TomKat Is Making BANK For The Tabs!

TomKat Split Saves The Tabs! Katie Holmes isn't making much ca$h from her split from Tom Cruise…. BUT someone is!

TomKat's broken marriage has totes revived tabloid sales.

Last week's gossip magazines saw higher profits than they have had in years. Since the split, covers featuring Katie and her ex-husband have been selling faster than you can say "Poor Xenu." Even Russell Brand is enjoying the juice!

Last week, People slung

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What The Tabs Are Talking About!

tabs mar 14 national enquirer

Sorry John, but this isn't even UR first gay sex scandal! Not good!

This week, John Travolta's alleged attempt to have sex with a male massage therapist that he picked up anonymously via Craigslist made the cover of National Enquirer…and made us all go "ugh."

The Kardashians were (of course) featured

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What The Tabs Are Talking About!

what the tabs are talking about feb 29

It's all about Brad, Angelina, and Kim this week!

Last week, In Touch told us all about Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush's secret plans to elope…but now Life & Style is saying that our gurl has been DUMPED!

Not only that, but Star is saying that Kim's moved on to a "Saudi Billionaire" after getting rejected by Reggie! Wowsa!

In non-Kardashian-related news, both In Touch and Ok! are talking about some SERIOUS Brad Pitt/Angelina Jolie wedding drama! Apparently, Angie's got some cray cray wedding demands, and Brad got into an EXPLOSIVE fight with her! Yikes!

Poor Whitney Houston remains in the headlines (of course). This time, Globe is saying that they've got newly revealed details about her "shocking secret life!" Apparently, Bobby Brown WASN'T the one who got her into drugs after all…….

As far as reality news is concerned, Reality Weekly is saying that Teen Mom Jenelle Evans has been "destroyed by mental illness," which is sad, but wouldn't entirely shock us. If she were mentally sound, you'd think she'd stop allowing herself to get into SO MUCH trouble! Ugh!

Which of this week's tabloid stories are U most interested in???

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What The Tabs Are Talking About!

what the tabs are talking about dec 14

Jennifer Aniston preggo with twins AND a Mileybird drug overdose? Once again, U've caught our attention Star Magazine! LOLz!

That's right, folks! According to Star, Jen is not only PREGNANT, but she's having twins! Wowsa!

And as a side story, they've got details on Miley Cyrus' drug overdose…..oh wait, it says "drug overdose scare." So, what does that mean? She took a hit of marijuana Salvia, coughed, and one of her buddies got paranoid??? LOLz!

In royal news, the tabs are also quite fixated on William and Kate this week! Not only are we STILL talking about the royal wedding, but apparently Kate's parents weren't invited to the palace for Xmas! Awk-ward!

Other than that, the tabloids are keepin' us up-to-date with KStew/RPatz relationship drama….and of course KimK/KHump post-relationship dramz as well!

Speaking of Kim Kardashian…it appears that Oprah called her a phony! We're not 100% sure why, but the cover of this week's Enquirer leads us to believe that Ms. Winfrey is skeptical of Kim's benevolent agenda in Haiti!

Quite a week for the tabs (above, and below)! Which of these stories intrigues U the most???

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