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This Guy Walks His Pet Giant Tortoise Around Like A Dog! That's A Long Walk!

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This is crazy! Crazy awesome!!

A man in Tokyo, Japan has been spotted walking his giant tortoise in and around the streets, and the African spurred tortoise seems to be quite comfortable in the concrete jungle.

Pretty cool considering the reptile is used to the southern Sahara desert.

[ Related: Man Caught Crossing Border With 51 Live Turtles In His Sweatpants! ]

But the Japanese pet owner walks the tortoise just like we walk our dog. Except, obvi he doesn't need a leash — not like it's going to run away!

Of course, these walks take a bit longer than walking a dog! LOLz!

Talk about a pet that requires patience!!!

[Image via Twitter.]

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ESPN Reporter Britt McHenry Suspended After Footage Of Her Tirade Against A Towing Company Worker Leaks Online!

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Little harsh, Gretch.

Prior to Thursday, Britt McHenry was just a moderately famous ESPN reporter.

However, that all changed when a rather ruthless video of the 28-year-old berating a towing company worker surfaced online and gained national attention.

Apparently, Britt had to slum it into a garage to retrieve her car last week and simply was not having it.

[ Related: Jon Hamm's Arrest Warrant For Violently Hazing A Pledge! ]

While it's clear that Britt was upset about the situation and not necessarily at the woman trying to provide assistance, she took it way too far when she started to insult the woman's intelligence, weight, and even her teeth.

Girl, not everyone can get by on their looks!

Following the outburst, Britt apologized via Twitter, saying:

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Japanese Game Show Features Karaoke And Handjobs! WTF?!

Filed under: TV NewsWacky, Tacky & TrueSex

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Well, this is the craziest idea for a game show that we've ever heard!

New Japanese game show Sing What Happens has a bizarre twist on the whole singing competition thing!

Actually, a twist AND a tug!

[ Video: Lip Sync Battle! Emily Blunt's Piece Of My Heart Vs. Anne Hathaway's Wrecking Ball!! ]

The show features contestants trying to hit super high notes and remember lyrics — wait for it — while getting handjobs! And they're expected to continue to sing even if they, ahem, climax.

And for winning, contestants receive sex toys, lube, and other crazy prizes!

This is one foreign game show we're guessing the U.S. WON'T be copying anytime soon!

Check out the cray, and at least conceptually NSFW video (below) !!!

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Cannes Is Cracking Down On Celebrity Selfies! Read All About The Ridiculous Red Carpet Rule HERE!

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This seems like a strange thing for them to care so much about…

In what's easily the start of a new awards season, Cannes released its official competition list on Thursday, but one of the most glaring snubs has nothing to do with movies at all!

[ Photos: Nick Jonas & Olivia Culpo Bring Sexy To Cannes! ]

In addition to praising films from around the world in 2015, the French film festival also wants to use its influence to put an end to the celebrity selfie!

Cannes President Pierre Lescure and festival director Thierry Frémaux have had it with celebrities taking selfies on the red carpet in the past and want to ensure they never happen again.

In fact, Thierry cares so vehemently about the act, that he actually released a statement on the issue, saying:

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A Man In Florida Got High On Flakka And Became Immune To Tasers Because He Thought He Was Thor!

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Typical.

There's only two weeks left until the Avengers: Age of Ultron premiere, and it seems like people all across the country are excited to see their favorite superheroes on screen!

In fact, one man in Florida was so pumped for the big day, that he decided to get high on Flakka and perform some lewd acts on a tree all while shouting that he was Thor.

And to prove that he was, in fact, the God of Thunder, Kenneth Crowder actually withstood two separate tasings because, you know, lightning can't hurt him.

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Finally A Pregnancy Announcement The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air Would Approve Of! Watch HERE!

This is the best pregnancy announcement we've seen in a while!

Now this is the story all about how this couple's lives got flipped turned upside down!!!

In this wonderful age of the internet, it feels like we've pretty much seen every kind of pregnancy announcement you can think of!

But while most couples go with awkward or cute (or both) photos, this momma and poppa in training decided to go with the less often used "rapping-pregnancy-announcement" approach!

And if that's not enough to get you hooked, they did it to the tune of the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song!!

[ Related: Prank Caller Recites Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air Theme Song On C-SPAN! ]

Jesse and Melissa Meeks from Happy Valley, Oregon put together the adorable video for their friends and family, but it didn't take long for the clip to go viral and it now has 1.7 million views!

We think Will and DJ Jazzy Jeff would approve!!

Ch-ch-check out the hilarious clip (below)!

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This 65-Year-Old Woman Is Pregnant! Oh, Did We Mention With Quadruplets!?

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At 65, Annegret Raunigk is considered a senior citizen.

But the German is defying convention — and many medical professionals' advice — by becoming pregnant.

And get this — she's having quadruplets!

Annegret got artificially inseminated after her 9-year-old daughter Lelia — who you can see in the above file photo — requested a little brother or sister. Annegret was 55 when when she gave birth to Lelia.

[ Related: Jill Duggar Describes 70 Hour Labor! ]

If all four babies come to term, they'll join Annegret's 13 (!) other children.

Here's what she says to all the haterz:

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