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Man Fails To Steal 2 Horses…After Stealing 2 Cars And An Ambulance?!!?!

What kind of criminal mastermind are we dealing with here?!!?

Matthew Anderson Todd had an…interesting….crime spree in Alabama as he attempted theft after theft in order to escape the Boaz police.

Todd was arrested for DUI after a car crash and he was taken to the hospital. But, he (still VERY drunk) left the hospital by stealing an ambulance!!!!

What.The.FEEZY?!?!?!

Todd got the ambulance stuck on a street and took refuge in a barn, where he tried to steal two horses, but failed miserably.

He then stole a car, crashed, and stole a second car, finally escaping…..

Until his original injuries started to bleed. He re-checked himself into the hospital where he was recognized and was arrested.

WILD CHILD!!!!

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Criss Angel Offers $5000 For Stolen Yorkie's Return

Filed under: Legal MattersSad SadPetsYorkiePuppyDogCrazzzzy

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What meanie would do such a thing as steal a person's DOG?!?!?!

Criss Angel is dropping his wand and opening up his wallet, in hopes that his Yorkie babe, as well as other puppies, will be returned.

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Lindsay Lohan TOTALLY Screwed: All Set To Rumble With Former Judge!

Filed under: Lindsay LohanLegal Matters

Lindsay Lohan Judge Change

We're betting Shawn Holley is breathing a huge sigh of relief!

Things are not looking so rosy for Lindsay Lohan as she is about to have a family reunion with Judge Stephanie Sautner.

OH SHIZZZZZ!

Let us refresh your memory of how inneresting this is since SO much has happened with LiLo since her Judge Sautner days.

This was the patient judge who covered that oh-so famous jewelry theft case and ended the matter by telling Lindsay:

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Katt Williams SUED For Taking An SUV Without Paying For It!

Filed under: Icky Icky PooLegal Matters

katt williams lawsuit used car theft antics

Katt Williams — man, that guy.

He made news once more after rescuing a kitten from a tree on his way to hand out blankets at homeless shelter he helped build after allegedly stealing a car!

According to a lawsuit filed by Khosrow Gharib, the controversial comedian "bought" a 10-year-old SUV from him, but never paid out the $7,500 he promised to pay!

Khorsrow repeatedly asked Katt to pay up, but he keeps getting stonewalled… so he took his greivances to court!

BAD kitty Katt!

You spend so much time at the courthouse, we're starting to wonder if you have a crush on one of the bailiffs and are just too nervous to ask him or her out the old-fashioned way, LOLz!

[Image via WENN.]

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BOOO!!!! Dognapping On The Rise In England!

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Who in the world would steal dogs?!?!?! DESPICABLE!!!

English investigators believe dognapping has increased 17 percent in 2012, as 3,500 doggie thefts were reported last year.

The crazy part?

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Jesse Tyler Ferguson Riots And Tries To Steal Private Plane?

Filed under: Wacky, Tacky & True

Jesse Tyler Ferguson Modern Family Private Plane

Probably not the most discreet item to steal!

But Modern Family star Jesse Tyler Ferguson didn’t realize anyone would notice him trying to take someone else’s private plane while leaving his vacation in St. Barts.

Seriously?! Does he know how big a plane is??

Jesse was with his fiancé, Justin Mikita, and two friends when he got into a little trouble at the airport, which really has to be one of the last places you want to get into trouble!

A witness revealed:

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Is Kevin Federline's BROTHER The REAL Father Of Britney Spears' Son Sean Preston?!

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What on EFFING Earth?!

We're used to hearing some pretty BIZARRE rumors about Britney Spears..but this DEFINITELY has to take holiday cake!

The pop sensation may be said to be struggling in her relationship to Jason Trawick, but according to The National Enquirer, her past marriage to ex-husband and baby daddy Kevin Federline is about to get a whole lot more contentious…because the back-up-dancer turned wannabe rapper's brother Christopher is now claiming to be the ACTUAL father of seven-year-old Sean Preston!

And that's just the tip of CRAZY iceberg!

Christopher reportedly filed for a temporary restraining order against Brit Brit earlier this month in Tampa, Florida, because he claimed

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