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Meat Is Getting New Names, We Can't Wait To Start Confusing Everything!

Filed under: Business BlitzFood

meat cuts new names summer usda pork beef

Just when we thought we had a hang on what meat was what at the supermarket, the USDA approved the National Pork Board and the National Cattlemen's Beef Association to rename cuts of meat. You know, to make it easier.

But not.

The idea is to adopt a system where things are labeled like they are in restaurants, but honestly people as the real cut name to understand THOSE names. It's happening this summer!

Here are some examples:

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PETA Helps USDA Find And Suspend License Of Cruel Bear Park!

Yay!!!! These bears get a chance to taste the sweet juices of justice!

Earlier this month, we told you about PETA's exposé on the cruelty, racism, and downright godawful abuse happening at the Chief Saunooke Bear Park in North Carolina.

Now, it's time for the sick and sad place to pay the piper!

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Beef Inspection Finds Serious Yucky Risks!

Filed under: Icky Icky PooFoodHealthSick

We always knew beef had risks, especially after hearing about pink slime, but after the Kansas City Star closely investigated the meat, we have become even more turned off by this icky edible!

The meat industry has been claiming that meat is safer than ever, but once the news source revealed that they found Fecal Contamination in beef, there's no way we can believe them.

The Star reported what was found at one of Tyson's beef plants, and we must say, it's NOT pretty:

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Novelty Beverage Co. Sued Because Zombie Blood Tastes Like Yogurt… Then Explodes

Zombie blood lawsuit makes for sad zombies

We wish we could make this stuff up!

Harcos Labs makes a novelty drink called zombie blood — it's green, slimy, gross, filled with protein, and explodes!

That last attribute was completely unintended.

Apparently the gross-out product was manufactured incorrectly and now when it spoils, the bag it comes in explodes.

Yikes!! Talk about a scary toy!!

All is not lost, however. There doesn't seem to be any recall involved with their supposedly tasty line of Zombie Jerky products!!

Seriously. They make USDA approved Zombie Jerky. It's green. And "TERIYUCKI" flavored.

A legal rep for Harcos said:

“I know there were some rumors that these exploding products turned some people into zombies, but my client fully denies those charges.”

Uhh. Okay.

Honestly, we're just glad to report zombie news that does NOT revolve around bath salt abuse

[Image via Stefan Jeremiah/WENN.]

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California Mad Cow's Baby Euthanized!

Filed under: Sad SadHealthSick

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USDA officials have tracked down one of the babies of the California mad cow!

The sad thing is they had to euthanize the offspring.

There is no test for bovine spongiform encephalopathy (BSE), also known as mad cow disease, that keeps the cow alive.

So they killed it and then studied the brain.

Even sadder? The baby didn't have mad cow disease.

We understand safety is first, but that doesn't make it any less sad.

It is important they do this, mainly because when people eat infected meat, they can become very sick from variant Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease (vCJD).

The disease affects a person's movement and mental abilities and can be fatal.

We hope they got the last of the cows so no people get sick and no more cows need to die!

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USDA Charges Circus After PETA Complaints

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Looks like a circus may be busted after not being so kind to their elephants!

After two complaints from PETA, the U.S. Dept. of Agriculture has filed formal charges against Cole Bros. Circus due to the lack of physical safety and psychological well-being of two elephants.

PETA claimed that Tina and Jewell were forced to travel and perform despite being underweight by HUNDREDS of pounds.

The USDA has filed over 10 charges against the circus and have confiscated both elephants.

The charges include:

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Largest Supermarket Chain In The U.S. Stops Selling Pink Slime

Filed under: Icky Icky PooBusiness BlitzFood

kroger pink slime

We're so glad food retailers are making the RIGHT decision by ending the sale of beef that includes what the meat companies call "lean, finely textured beef," and what we call "gross."

Kroger, the largest chain of supermarkets in the U.S., has announced it will no longer purchase beef with pink slime, an ammonia-treated filler/cheap and disgusting substitute for real meat.

The grocery giant released a statement explaining their decision that reads:

"Our customers have expressed their concerns that the use of lean finely textured beef — while fully approved by the USDA for safety and quality — is something they do not want in their ground beef. As a result, Kroger will no longer purchase ground beef containing lean finely textured beef."

Thank you!

Kroger has joined Safeway, the second-largest supermarket chain, in their initiative, along with Dutch-owned chain Stop & Shop.

Does your store still sell pink slime? Don't buy it! Tell the managers you want ACTUAL meat and you'll take your business elsewhere if they don't get it.

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