As John Travolta always never says, "whenever Xenu closes a door, he opens a window… to an intergalactic space cruiser!"
Likewise, AMC renewed The Walking Dead for a fourth season yesterday, but closed the door on their current former show-runner! Yay!/Aww!
Those saddened to not find an apocalypse outside their window yesterday morning should find comfort in knowing the dead will walk the earth for at least another year!
Why wasn't season three show-runner Glen Mazzara invited to participate?!
Tags: amc, fired, glen mazzara, john travolta, replacement, season four, show runner, the walking dead, tv news, twitter, xenu
The selection process is nearly that intense!
While the Jack Reacher star doesn't go so far as to test his minions' blood for traces of Xenu, Tom Cruise does force his otherwise-qualified auxiliary staff of assistants, drivers, hit-men, & estate managers to jump through hoops at the Scientology Celebrity Center in Hollywood!
One source close to the family revealed:
Tags: assistants, family, hollywood, job opportunity, katie holmes, sarlacc, scientology, tom cruise, wacky tacky true, xenu
Xenu have mercy!
We know hear John Travolta is a fan of happy endings, but this claim sounds unbelievable!!
The star of Look Who's Talking, Look Who's Talking Too, and Look Who's Talking Now traveled to China recently where he practiced his faith healing in between bites of sesame shrimp.
The actor revealed:
Tags: assists, faith healing, grease, happy endings, john travolta, look whos talking, look whos talking now, look whos talking too, scientology, shanghai, wild hugs, xenu
Rich or poor, skinny or fat, secularist or Scientologist, Hurricane Sandy continues to affect everyone in New York City!
Katie Holmes, like many other Chelsea residents, were sadly displaced in the wake of the deadly catastrophe.
She and daughter Suri Cruise weathered the storm, literally, for as long as possible, but the devastating effects eventually forced them to relocate.
Tags: chelsea, evacuation, hurricane, hurricane sandy, katie holmes, mark hotel, new york, scary, storm, suri cruise, xenu
Everyone knows how rough a divorce can be for a little girl caught in the middle! Sometimes we overlook how hard it is on the estranged parent who rarely sees their child!
Tom Cruise recently spoke out about his inability to see Suri Cruise and he became very emotional.
He revealed:
Tags: all you need is kill, brooklyn, custody, disney, divorce, katie holmes, london, love line, suri cruise, tom cruise, xenu
Looks like Robert Pattinson is safe from the clutches of Xenu for now!
Or at least Kirstie Alley, anyway!
Although reports have circulated that the actress, who is a well-known Scientologist, has been spearheading a campaign to get the recently heartbroken actor to join the religion to make it more appealing to the younger generation, it's apparently NOT true it all!
And how do we know?
Because Kirstie has reached out
Tags: campaign, confirmation, cult, denial, kirstie alley, lure, robert pattinson, scientology, twitter, xenu
SCRUMPTIOUS! The wonders of Photoshop, huh! LOL! We kid, we kid!
Tom Cruise is displaying his shapely stomach in the latest poster for the comedy-musical-drama Rock Of Ages.
OUCH! We could cut our tongues on such defined muscles!
And all this time we were simply worrying about his singing! Forget that: your abs are the hazard, Cruise!
We are readying ourselves for this musical wonder… WHEN WILL YOU DESCEND UPON US??
[Image via New Line Cinema.]
Tags: abs, adam shankman, cut, hot, rock of ages, scientology, xenu
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