Here we go with another one of America's craziest traditions!
That's right, it's the real life America's Hunger Games!!
The White House wants U to choose which turkey will be pardoned on Thanksgiving day, which is terrifying because does this mean that Obama goes out in the back yard and kills the losing turkey?? Talk about another downfall of Obamacare!
Two turkeys, Caramel and Popcorn, are both fighting for their lives and a Presidential pardon!
Not only does each bird have a baseball card style list of stats, which you can see (below), you can even LISTEN to their gobbles and decide who you like best.
The two birds were hatched on the same day on the farm of John Burkel near Badger, Minnesota, and raised at the same time.
And now, the new "cool" U.S. government is even using hashtags and making references to pop culture (Popcorn is a big Beyonce fan).
This is all pretty terrible. It's bad enough we raise birds in captivity just to kill and eat them but now we're making a spectacle of sparing one of two turkeys while millions of others lose their lives?
We are going to withhold our vote in hopes that both these turkeys survive. We refuse to pick only one bird to be saved.
Save both turkeys! Carmel and Popcorn deserve the pardon because carmel popcorn is delicious! #CaramelPopcorn
[Image via The White House.]