The next 50 Shades Of Grey is here!
Like most of us, comic Elijah Daniel has been in genuine disbelief following the presidential campaign of Donald Trump.
Frustrated by the fact that the GOP frontrunner is still leading in the polls, the 22-year-old was inspired to write some Trump fan-fiction — but instead ended up creating what could be the next great American novel!
Trump Temptations: The Billionaire and the Bellboy tells the erotic story of two unlikely strangers who undergo a salacious affair!
Set in the summer of 2012 in Hong Kong, a bellboy meets a mysterious stranger with “tacky luggage” and the distinct smell of slime. The book reads:
“It was him. It was Donald! He stood there in front of me, like a tall stallion. With his oily orange skin glistening in the sunlight as if he were a soggy Cheeto, his hair unkept and messy, like a gorgeous rat’s nest. He was beautiful.”
Daniel penned this masterpiece after
threatening pitching the idea to his Twitter followers:
i’m going to get drunk tonight and write an entire donald trump sex novel like 50 shades of grey & put it on amazon tomorrow i swear to god.
├óΓé¼ΓÇ¥ Elijah Daniel (@aguywithnolife) January 21, 2016
The author then got super drunk and high — and four hours later, he had birthed the romantic novella filled with poetic lines like:
“His gorgeous ass flapped behind him like a mouthwatering stack of pancakes in his pants…
His Wikipedia page says he’s 69 year young, what a magical number. I’d like to find out more about that. It also says that his nickname is The Donald, but I’m pretty sure they mean Daddy.”
At 10 pages long, Trump Temptations is #1 on Amazon‘s Gay and Humorous Erotica lists — and is garnering TONS of 5-star reviews!
I just beat out the girl who wrote 50 shades of grey in the top erotica authors of amazon someone stab me
├óΓé¼ΓÇ¥ Elijah Daniel (@aguywithnolife) January 24, 2016
We would LOVE to hear the candidates thoughts on this erotica. Let’s be honest, he would probably claim he’s a far better writer and end up penning an autobiographical erotic novel of his own! LOLz!
[Image via Amazon.]