And they say romance is dead. They said the same thing about newspapers! Ha!
Over the weekend, Arthur Brooks dropped almost $1K on a full-page newspaper dating ad… but it wasn’t for him! The Beverly Hills man wrote the love pitch from the perspective of his 48-year-old son, Baron!
The Coeur d’Alene Press ad explains that the Salt Lake City resident has never been married and wants kids “as soon as possible!”
Is it medically possible to die of embarrassment?
But the bulletin even goes on to describe
Baron’s Arthur’s requirements for female suitors, saying they must be “attractive being height and weight proportional.”
And while the 34-38 age range is “flexible,” there are some traits that are listed as “MUSTS!”
For example, the potential lady love must move to Salt Lake City, be politically conservative, and is not allowed to wear heels if she’s 5’8″ since Baron is apparently 5’5″.
If they have kids, the woman is expected to give up her job to be a stay at home mom.
Oh, and Arthur was setting himself up to screen the candidates, writing:
I have asked my father to screen people for me. He will be at the Coeur d’Alene Resort. You may call for an interview on my behalf on Friday June 24th at ***-***-****. When calling the Resort ask for Arthur Brooks. Interviews will take place Saturday June 25th. Please bring a short one page description, background and a current photo.”
Here’s why there’s such an extensive application process:
“The person or persons selected will be given round trip air ticket as well as first class lodgings. You may bring a chaperone if you wish; mother, father, friend, etc. Their expenses will also be paid. We will go out on a dinner date and go from there.”
But the craziest part might be the health food store owner had NO IDEA this was a thing until he saw the ad in the North Idaho paper.
Baron told The Spokesman-Review that he’s mortified over his father’s meddling, saying:
“My father did this without my consent. I can’t even describe to you how embarrassing and ridiculous this is.”
And while he’s pretty pissed at his poppa, he also doesn’t want to hurt his father’s feelings. So, he’s allowing Arthur to follow through with the interviews, adding:
“What am I supposed to do? He already did it. No sense in defusing a bomb once it’s already gone off.”
But Baron admitted that bizarre behavior like this isn’t exactly new for Arthur, revealing:
“Ever since he went into congestive heart failure he’s done some really kooky stuff. And this one takes the cake.”
While the businessman is currently dating two different women right now, he confessed that he doubts either relationship will end in marriage.
What do U think about this crazy classified???
[Image via Coeur d’Alene Press.]