Brace Yourselves — Here Are Donald Trump’s First Three Executive Orders!

Donald Trump signs his first three executive orders.

Here we go, everybody! Hold onto your butts!

Donald Trump signed his first three executive orders Monday, regarding trade, the federal workforce, and abortion funding.

Related: Sean Spicer Talks A Lot Of Nonsense In First Press Briefing

The actions officially withdraw the U.S. from the Trans-Pacific Partnership, TPP, which was championed by President Obama, implement a hiring freeze on federal workers, and prevent nations receiving foreign aid from promoting abortion as a method of family planning.

The freeze on federal hiring is actually a move to shrink the size of the government, although the 70-year-old was quick to state that it wouldn’t affect the size and power of the military. Of course it wouldn’t.

Meanwhile, it seems to go directly against his promise to create jobs for American workers.

Moreover, the bloated carrot’s withdrawal from the TPP was actually praised by Bernie Sanders, who has otherwise been vocally opposed to many of Trump’s actions and policies.

Bernie said:

“I am glad the Trans-Pacific Partnership is dead and gone. For the last 30 years, we have had a series of trade deals ├óΓé¼ΓÇ¥ including the North American Free Trade Agreement, permanent normal trade relations with China and others ├óΓé¼ΓÇ¥ which have cost us millions of decent-paying jobs and caused a ‘race to the bottom’ which has lowered wages for American workers. If President Trump is serious about a new policy to help American workers then I would be delighted to work with him.”

Et tu, Bernard?

We never thought we’d see the day when Bernie actually praised Drumpf!

Finally, Trump’s bans on abortion funding will only cause more abortions to occur, which his tiny brain is too shriveled up to comprehend. It’s been proven time and again that banning abortions doesn’t actually reduce the number. People turn to illegal and often dangerous means, which also often puts their lives at risk.

But we all know Mr. Cheeto cares nothing about women’s health anyway!

This is only day three of this waste of space’s time in office. It’s going to be a long four years!

[Image via Twitter.]

Jan 23, 2017 4:05pm PDT

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