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Abstaining! No Sex Until Bristol Is Mrs. Johnston!

Abstaining! No Sex Until Bristol Is Mrs. Johnston!

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On this very special episode of The Secret Life Of An American Politician’s Effed Up Daughter, Bristol Palin has swore to keep her kaslopis closed for business until she is married.
Yeah, yeah. We’ve heard that one before, but supposedly, she is sticking to her mother’s guns this time around!
This morning’s announcement that Bristol has agreed to marry her baby daddy Levi Johnston was followed by the realization that Bristol is a spokes-hypocrite for abstinence. Considering that she doesn’t want to be labeled a whore twice in her life, sources suspect that Bristol’s engagement time will be spent picking out camouflage floral arrangements and not creating a sister for Tripp.
Hear that Levi! This ain’t like the first time! The kitchen is closed until you make a mildly honest woman out of her! Think you can wait that long???
(Probably not!)
[Image via AP Images.]

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Jul 14, 2010 14:30pm PDT

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