From the best fleeting moment at a concert to the worst realization of what actually was going on… this story is giving us whiplash!! But let’s take YOU to the beginning of the roller coaster…
Back in late August, country music superstar Chris Stapleton performed a concert in Birmingham, Alabama. Among the many in attendance at the show was a woman named Pam, who is active on TikTok under the handle @pamj2990. Now 59 years old, Pam had spent the last 42 years (!) with the same man. Damn! But after their relationship came to an end, she has been ready to do her own thing. And Chris’ concert was one of those things — a solo night out on the town! Fun, right?!
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Well, it certainly started that way. As Pam explained in an interview on Monday with People, she initially intended to just go see Stapleton perform live. No other intentions. She certainly had no plan to go mega-viral!!
“Last minute, I bought a ticket. I was standing in the pit right in front of the stage. I met all these cool women around me. Chris Stapleton is my favorite, too. It was an amazing experience.”
@pamj2990 I was SOOOO close!! His music touches my soul! So so good ???? #chrisstapleton #concerts #music #soul #jazz #christstapletonconcert #dating #pitcrew #greatnight #alabama #birmingham #country @Chris Stapleton
So what changed? The concert quickly turned more interesting when a mystery man sidled up to her from out of the blue:
“I’m enjoying it and there’s this tall man who walks up next to me. He says, ‘I’ve been here since five o’clock. I’m trying to get back up to the front.’ And I said, ‘We’ll just say excuse me and they’ll let you through.'”
But instead of just walking by, the man made a VERY smooth move before disappearing into the crowd:
“He put his arm around my waist. It really took me by surprise and he said, ‘Now I don’t know what to do. I don’t know whether I should go back from where I was, or stay here with you.’ And before I could say anything, he turned around and walked off. He was gone.”
OMG!!!
Talk about a sexy move! And so smooth, too! Assuming Pam was on board, of course, which… well, spoiler alert, she most definitely was! In fact, she was “so disappointed” she didn’t make more of the moment when she had the opportunity. She tried to find him later on in the venue, too — but it was a big crowd and too dark. The night ended, and she never saw him again.
For DAYS afterwards, she kept thinking about the handsome fella! Now these are the kinds of things that used to be stories you’d just have to let go. But this is the internet age, baby! A lot different from when Pam started dating! Eventually, she realized that she had an asset in her pocket: TikTok!
“It still affected me days later. And I am on TikTok, but I was just a scroller. I never posted any content but one day I just decided, ‘Maybe TikTok can help me find who this guy is.'”
She started filming videos and reaching out for help from the TikTok community, and that’s when she unexpectedly went viral. You can see one of her vids (below):
@pamj2990 #birminghamalabama #chrisstapleton #help #concert #alabama #single #tiktok #singleinmy50s #willifindhim #whereishe
Sounds like one of those cute internet love stories, right?
But there is a huge (and HORRIBLE) catch here! Just three days after Pam started filming videos, someone did reach out about this guy. As Pam explained to People, the woman dropped the bomb… that the man was married! And not only that, HE WAS AT THE CONCERT WITH HIS WIFE!!!! Pam recalled:
“She said, ‘I was not far from you. They were standing right next to us, we actually talked to them.’ And I asked, ‘Is he single?’ She said, ‘No, he’s married. His wife was right there with him.'”
WTF?!?!
From there, Pam learned that the guy lives REALLY close to her. She also came to learn that he is indeed married — and he’s got a pretty high profile job in the area! The woman who reached out even followed up with the guy’s name AND a picture of him, which helped Pam confirm that he was indeed the very same man who’d flirted with her at the show. Pam said:
“I just found it very odd that a married man would walk up to a woman like that with maybe six people standing between them and their spouse.”
Seriously! What an effboy move! And for a married man of some years, to boot!
Even though she may be astonished at his behavior, Pam says she does NOT want to out the guy publicly! She doesn’t even plan to warn his wife about the red flag! Instead, the now-viral TikTok sensation explained:
“They wanted me to reach out to his wife, and that’s not my job. I’m not into destroying relationships or marriages. I didn’t make that event happen. I was standing in one spot for five hours and he came up to me, so I didn’t feel it was my job to contact his wife. And nothing happened.”
And she added:
“It started some conversations. A few people thought I was naive for thinking he wasn’t spoken for. But I literally spent 42 years locked up with the same man and I’m new to this world and figuring it all out. This is all brand new to me.”
She’s being a bigger person than a lot of us probably would be in that situation. That’s for sure!
@pamj2990 #alabama #chrisstapleton #concertguy #married #dating #tiktok #scumbags #cheaters #relationship #love
Ultimately, Pam is both confused and astounded that events could have ever played out like it did. While speaking about the entire situation with People, she looked back on her dating life way back in the day when she was a teen in the early ’80s. Amid that nostalgic moment, she lamented how the way things were back then will never, ever come around again:
“I got married when I was 17. I had children very early. I’ve got five grandchildren. When I was dating, as a teenager, you met people in school. I knew them, I knew their families. I knew their history. Fast forward 42 years and it’s a very somber scene. You weed out scammers and people who are too far away, who you have things in common with, and you’re left with singles who are desperately lonely. I’m trying to figure out a way to take it from behind a phone to face to face. Completely gone are the days of meeting people in church, at parties, social functions, on vacations. Even people matching friends up, all that’s over. I think it’s gotten worse in recent years because people are so scared to be vulnerable and put themselves out there, to trust again.”
Sadly, she’s not wrong… Though we should note, she never had the experience of dating as a 59-year-old woman in the ’80s either. We’ll just bet that was no picnic compared to being a 17-year-old either!
Pam went on to say she is putting herself out there, but her excitement is tainted by mistrust now:
“I have a date coming up. How do I know he’s not married, or divorced, or paroled? That trust factor is damaged between people. Women over 40 are also just done. So many have locked in on the notion that they are never looking again, ever dating again. They are happily single after being hurt or scorned and are content to die single and never talk about it.”
But she tried to end things on a positive note! She concluded:
“You have to do different things. I was scared to death to travel solo and I’m doing that now, because it gets me out of my comfort zone. That concert was the first time I went to a concert alone. I loved it and I’ll do it again. You gotta swallow that confidence pill and get out there and just do whatever you want to do and be happy. Just live your life.”
Well, that’s nice. But still, what a wild ride! What the hell was this guy thinking?! And with his wife standing just a few feet away, no less?? Absolutely unhinged behavior! Just saying!
[Image via Pam/TikTok/MEGA/WENN.]
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