[Warning: Potentially Triggering Content]
Colton Underwood is finally talking all the Traitors backlash these past few months about the stalking controversy!
Perezcious readers know The Bachelor alum has been the #1 villain of this season for fans due to his controversial past with his ex-girlfriend, Cassie Randolph. She had to get a restraining order against Colton after he allegedly threatened her, created an anonymous stalker account, and put a tracking device on her car to keep an eye on her following their 2020 breakup. In November of that year, Cassie dropped the whole thing after they reached a private agreement.
After Colton came out the following year, he has been hesitant to address the nasty stalking situation. In fact, he revealed to Vanity Fair in an interview on Thursday that he only agreed to star on The Traitors if producers swore not to bring up the drama with Cassie on camera! Whoa! He said:
“I met with production. I met with Peacock. I was like, ‘I’m down to do this,’ because this show is about strategy. It is about the game. It is about traitors. It is not personal. My only ask is, like, if I do this, I don’t want people to bring up anything outside of the game. I have a family now, right? I’m…so far past what happened six years ago.”
Related: Lisa Rinna Was Drugged With FENTANYL At Traitors Party, She Claims
Production could not keep the promise, at least not off-screen! Colton’s co-star Lisa Rinna called him out for being a “stalker” online — and so have many fans, who are angry over Colton being on the show in the first place! However, the former football player insists that not everyone knows what fully happened six years ago.
Yet when given the opportunity to address everything following his elimination from The Traitors in January, he did not take it. He agreed to talk to Entertainment Tonight only if the publication didn’t ask any questions about Cassie, despite it being a big part of his story during his journey this season. His excuse? Colton told Vanity Fair he “didn’t want to add fuel to the fire” at the time, adding:
“I don’t feel like it’s appropriate that every time I work or I do something that she’s mentioned and tagged in hundreds and thousands of articles. I can only speak for myself, but I can imagine that would be extremely difficult and also frustrating. So out of respect for the situation, I didn’t want to go into it. It’s important now to be honest and sit here for those of you who have been asking for accountability from me. I have done it in the past. I will continue to do it. … It was handled privately, and there was an agreement that we were leaving it in the past and moving forward with both of our lives. There was no strategy in that Entertainment Weekly article, other than not wanting to add fuel to a fire.”
The television personality now feels the “temperature changed,” and he is ready to provide all the necessary context about what he was going through during the controversy. Looking back on 2020, he said he was struggling so much with his sexuality that he thought he only had two options: either come out or die by suicide:
“It was, as people remember, COVID. I was fully convinced that she was gonna be my last straight…like, I was going to have to either kill myself or come out. That’s just transparently, like, where my mindset was. I don’t know if this is the right phrase, but it was somewhat of the perfect storm of me hitting rock bottom, of me really trying to navigate, ‘Am I gonna kill myself or am I gonna come out?’ That’s just where I was at.”
Despite experiencing a tough time, Colton expressed that he “will always feel guilt” over how he handled everything back then:
“And I will always own the mistakes that I made. I will always feel guilt and feel this extreme sadness for how I showed up for certain friends, for people in my life. Also fans—letting people down. At that point, people had been sort of invested in me and in my story. So I did feel like not only I let myself down, I let a lot of people down there.”
The Masked Singer alum went on to explain he was also battling an Xanax and prescription medications addiction at the time:
“I was struggling with Xanax and prescription medications. It was a pretty intense moment in my life where I made some really, really poor decisions.”
Oof…
Since many people do not know these things about him, Colton shared that this is what makes all this “difficult” for him:
“The difficult part now is seeing the people who have a lot to say about what happened six years ago. It’s lacking a lot of the context of where our world was at, but also where I was at, the state of mind that I was in. The pressures and the threats that I was going through. I will always take accountability. I will always own mistakes that I made. But everything that you’re seeing on social media—these videos, these people who have a lot to say—is not correct.”
He promised he has “put a lot of work into” himself since the stalking scandal, and he is “proud” of who he is these days:
“I’ve worked with almost every network. I’ve shown up as a professional, I’ve shown up as a human being. I’ve taken accountability. I can sit here and tell you I’ve changed all the time. I think better than that, I can point to the last six years of my life. I’m proud of who I’ve become. I’m proud of the man that I am. I’m proud of the husband that I am. I’m proud of the father that I am. Like, I am really proud of the growth and the work that I’ve put in.”
According to Colton, part of that work was going to “intense therapy” for two months straight when everything went down:
“When this first all started to happen, I went home to Colorado and I met with both my parents to fill them in. I surrendered my medication. I asked them to help me meet with a psychologist and a therapist, and put myself basically in intense therapy. I had to go seek intense help. I was meeting with a therapist and a psychologist once a week for about two months straight in Colorado.”
As for where he stands with Cassie after all these years? Colton revealed they are not on speaking terms – but would be open to talking to her one day:
“I have no contact. If she ever did reach out or want to reach out, I would be open to answering any questions that her or her family would have for me. That is something I’ve always offered. I’m in no position to really say much more than that or reach out. There’s been no part of me that would. I would always be up for it. It’s all on her terms.”
Something tells us, just like Colton, she wants to leave the controversy in the past! So no, we don’t think a heart-to-heart will happen between them anytime soon, if ever! And at the end of the day, Colton knows he can’t make anyone, not even Cassie, forgive him:
“I’m fully understanding if you want to never forgive me, if you want to hold my feet to the fire for the rest of my life. But I know that people who matter most in my life have shown forgiveness and love and support and the understanding that we all have gone through a difficult time. There is a part of me that does understand these people who are upset. I think a lot of them do lack a lot of the context and the complexity of the situation. But I don’t know if it’s necessarily for me to answer, ‘Do I wish they would forgive me?’ It’s not up to me.”
At least Colton recognizes that!
What are your thoughts, Perezcious readers? Let us know in the comments (below)!
If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, help is available. Consider contacting the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988, by calling, texting, or chatting, or go to 988lifeline.org.
If you or someone you know is experiencing substance abuse, help is available. Consider checking out the resources SAMHSA provides at https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/national-helpline or check out StartYourRecovery.org.
[Image via Cassie Randolph/Instagram, Peacock/YouTube]
