Did you miss the most recent episode of Game Of Thrones and need a recap? Or have you already listened to several recaps but found that they weren’t sassy enough?
Fear not… Queer Eye’s Jonathan Van Ness is here to catch you up!
The hairstylist is back with another episode of Gay Of Thrones, the hysterical Funny or Die series in which he breaks down episodes of the HBO fantasy hit with all the Van-real-Ness you’d expect. This time, he has celebrity guest Anna Faris to help him discuss all the events that went down in the second episode of Season 8, titled A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms.
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As Thrones fans already know, a lot happens in the hour that takes place in Winterfell as our heroes in the north prepare for the battle against the Night King’s army of the dead. But, as Jonathan explains, the episode starts off with some friction between “Christina Aguilera” — aka Daenerys Targaryen (Emilia Clarke) — and “Sansa Fierce” — aka Sansa Stark (Sophie Turner) — when it came to dealing with Kingslayer-turned-potential-ally Brother D — aka Jaime Lannister (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) — pleading to fight for the living.
Jonathan and the actress agree that Dany and Sansa tried their best to reconcile at the “Winterfell Women’s Power Summit” — that scene with the two of them in a room — but, as Van Ness points out, Sansa’s “making like the Dixie Chicks and she’s not ready to make nice.”
To that, Faris dropped a bombshell about her Mom costar, quipping:
“Allison Janney does the same sh*t to me at work. Like, one day she’s bringing me coffee and the next day she’s threatening me with her dragons.”
Ha! Now we know how Janney wins all those Emmys…
Of course, the duo had plenty to say about the episode’s most talked about scene: “Baby Kill Bill” — aka Arya Stark (Maisie Williams) — losing her virginity to Gendry Baratheon (Joe Dempsie).
Like most viewers, Van Ness was shocked over the jaw-dropping sex scene — and he used a timely Elizabeth Berkley metaphor to explain why:
“Baby Kill Bill went from Jesse Spano to Nomi Malone in the blink of an eye… Who knew the last thing on that list was for her to kill some D?”
Van Ness then discussed the heartwarming scene where “Tilda” — aka Brienne of Tarth (Gwendoline Christie) “shatters the dragon glassceiling” when she was knighted by Jaime.
Before comparing Brienne’s long overdue recognition to the time he cheered at senior night at his high school, Van Ness applauded “Mr. Grace Coddington” — aka Tormund Giantsbane (Kristofer Hivju) — for blasting Westeros’ patriarchal knighthood traditions. He noted:
“Honey, if a dirty murderer rocking an animal carcass can understand toppling the patriarchy, any man can.”
Yas, Knight!!
Ch-ch-check out the latest episode of Gay Of Thrones (below) to hear Van Ness’s full recap!
Jonathan Van Ness (@jvn) loves three things: Petee’s Pies, Micellar water, and Game of Thrones. This week he is joined by the fabulous @AnnaKFaris. pic.twitter.com/K8vZwsStqV
— Funny Or Die (@funnyordie) April 23, 2019
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