
Joan Rivers was one of the greatest comedy minds of all time.
The Fashion Police host never missed a trick– or a tweet!
When Twitter was invented, it was just the perfect venue for her amazing one-liners, and she adapted to it with aplomb.
Here are some of her best lines poking fun at Kim Kardashian, Taylor Swift, Justin Bieber, Ashton Kutcher, and most of all, herself:
A man reportedly got his finger bitten off at a Beyoncé concert! The shocking twist: It wasn't Jay Z's finger and it wasn't by Solange.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) August 27, 2014
Celine Dion’s asking $72 million for her Florida home. For that you get 5 bathrooms and the promise of never hearing the Titanic song again.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) August 25, 2014
I am definitely going to watch The Emmys this year! My makeup team is nominated for "Best Special Effects.”
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) August 23, 2014
I’m not surprised that a man my age has not asked me out in a while. They’ve all been too busy shooting “Expendables 3.”
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) August 19, 2014
A study says owning a dog makes you 10 years younger. My first thought was to rescue 2 more, but I don’t want to go through menopause again.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) August 6, 2014
Justin Bieber is going to be the new face of Calvin Klein underwear. We've gone from Marky Mark to Douchey Douche.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) August 2, 2014
Rosie O’Donnell is returning to The View and I'm so excited. Why should Ellen DeGeneres and Bruce Jenner be the only lesbians on TV?
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) July 26, 2014
As a wedding gift, Ray J gave Kim Kardashian his profits from their sex tape. It’s “Something Old” as well as “Something Blew.”
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) May 25, 2014
Lady Gaga accused Katy Perry of stealing her ideas. And Gaga knows she's right because she can remember stealing them from Madonna first.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) May 16, 2014
I’m so worried about Kim and Kanye’s wedding. Their photo album is going to be the first ever that has a money shot.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) April 27, 2014
Madonna had $3000 worth of underwear stolen from her. Now what is she going to wear to her boyfriend’s prom?
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) April 17, 2014
Mila Kunis is pregnant with Ashton Kutcher's child, and Demi Moore is thrilled. If it's a boy, Demi will be able to date him in 14 years.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) April 1, 2014
Selena Gomez reportedly ended her friendship with Taylor Swift. How sad! Taylor can't even keep a woman around these days.
— Joan Rivers (@Joan_Rivers) March 21, 2014
[Image via BauerGriffinOnline.]
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