The world’s biggest narcissist, John Mayer, has offered his thoughts on the problems of Tiger Woods, sexting and his case of schadenfreude.
Here are some HIGHlights:
On explaining the Tiger scenario:
“Tiger Woods’ problems come from him being married. The end. It has nothing to do with control. If Tiger Woods was a single guy, what sort of angle would there be to a text message? If Tiger Woods was single, and he texted a girl and said ‘I wanna wear your ass like a hat’, why would that ever hit the news?”On his personal sexting:
“I write a lot of dirty text messages to girls, and you’ve never seen any of them. Why? Because if a girl brought a dirty text message from me to the newspapers, they’d say ‘I don’t have an angle here. Someone wants to wear your ass like a hat? Big deal. He’s 32 years old. He’s a single guy. If John Mayer has a wife and sends dirty texts, then we got a story.'”On Tiger’s misfortune making him look good:
“With this whole Tiger Woods situation…I wish more people would be like, ‘You know what, Mayer? You didn’t f*** up at all.'”
Even the most notorious fuck up isn’t gonna make you look good, Mayer!
P.S. Shut your mouth already!
[Image via HRC/WENN.]