It’s been six years since Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin made their infamous breakup announcement about “conscious uncoupling,” and now, the 47-year-old actress has had the benefit of time to look back on that moment in reflection!
Paltrow really opens up about it in a new personal essay for British Vogue that’s centered on her first marriage to the Coldplay frontman, as well as the fallout she felt in the aftermath of their infamously unique breakup reveal. And to hear her tell it now, well, it turns out you readers weren’t the only ones skeptical about the term “consciously uncoupling”!
Related: Gwyneth Paltrow Learned How To Give A Blow Job From… Rob Lowe’s Wife?!
Writing about the moments she began to realize her marriage to Martin was over — first specifically on a trip to Italy for her 38th birthday in 2010 — the mom of two recalled how after years of working through marital discord, it was a therapist who first suggested the unforgettable phrase. Skeptical about it herself, the Goop founder wrote (below):
“Frankly, the term sounded a bit full of itself, painfully progressive and hard to swallow.”
LOLz! She’s right about that! But in time, Paltrow began to come around to the idea of conscious uncoupling as a way to step back from marriage. After all, as she notes in the essay, it took her and Martin more than four years to really realize breaking up was the right move to make for both of them, and healthy for daughter Apple (now 16) and son Moses (now 14).
Paltrow looked back at that tough time, reflecting:
“It would be years until we said the words aloud. But, that weekend [in Italy, in 2010], a dam had cracked just enough to hear the unrelenting trickle of truth. And it grew louder until it was all I could hear. We were close, though we had never fully settled into being a couple. We just didn’t quite fit together. There was always a bit of unease and unrest. But man, did we love our children.”
And while the Shakespeare In Love actress admits she and Martin “tried everything” to save their marriage, things only got harder for the first year or so after their initial split. Paltrow wrote:
“It was a hit and miss. We had great days and terrible days. Days when we couldn’t stand each other, but forced ourselves to remember what we were aiming for.”
Perhaps the most interesting part of the essay comes in the aftermath of the “conscious uncoupling” announcement itself. While the Iron Man star acknowledges the phrase has now (seriously or jokingly) “permeated the breakup culture” as its own sort of meme, back then she’d been surprised to watch the widespread negative public response to her usage of the term.
Related: Are We About To See A Gwyneth Vs. Meghan Battle Online??
Shocked and saddened by the negativity she felt from the public after the announcement, the proud momma wrote:
“It saw me bury my head in the sand deeper than I ever had in my very public life.”
Wow! Still, all’s well that ends well for Paltrow, Martin, and their two children, apparently! The Shallow Hal actress, who went to marry producer Brad Falchuk in 2018, concluded her piece with a hopeful turn about love, family, co-parenting, and mutual respect, writing:
“It’s OK to stay in love with the parts of your ex that you were always in love with. In fact, that’s what makes conscious uncoupling work. Love all of those wonderful parts of them. They still exist, they can still make you feel the way you felt for that person. Rather than shutting them out, lean into the unfamiliarity of those feelings and explore them. I know my ex-husband was meant to be the father of my children, and I know my current husband is meant to be the person I grow very old with. Conscious uncoupling lets us recognize those two different loves can coexist and nourish each other.”
So there you have it! It’s obviously nice to see things have worked out well for Paltrow, Martin, and the ex-couple’s two children. But we’d be lying if we didn’t admit it’s also nice to know Gwyneth regarded “conscious uncoupling” to be as ridiculous as the rest of us did! At least for a while, that is! It’s refreshing to hear her admit it!
What do U think, Perezcious readers? Sound OFF about it with your reactions in the comments down (below)!!!
[Image via Dominic Chan/WENN]
Related Posts
