One author didn’t have a very happy birthday this year! And once you hear how her husband reacted, your day won’t be much better!
Rebecca Patrick-Howard, a paranormal writer, went viral on Threads after sharing a lengthy story about how her entire family, including her own husband, forgot about her birthday on Tuesday! UGH!
All day, she thought he and their children said nothing because they planned something special — but with only an hour left, she realized that wasn’t the case. As you can imagine, Rebecca is upset! As she should be! She wrote:
“Well, there’s 1 more hour left in this day and it’s become clear that my husband and kids forgot my birthday. I thought they were being quiet because they’d planned something. I was wrong. … I’m going to see how long it actually takes them to remember and who it hits first. See how long it rides out. It really does hurt my feelings, though. Jack Lackey, after 5 months of dating, not acknowledging my 16th birthday back in 1996 didn’t prepare me for this”
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For more context, according to Rebecca, she asked her family if they wanted to get Indian food on Tuesday, but she didn’t mention it was for her birthday. (Honestly, she shouldn’t have to remind them!) When the fam were “evasive” about the plan, she began to think they had something up their sleeve:
“At some point I could’ve reminded them myself, but at first I really thought there might be a surprise. A few days ago I was like, ‘So where do we all want to go on Tuesday?’ and the fam was evasive. Then yesterday I asked again, ‘So are we okay with the Indian place tomorrow?’ And again, kind of evasive. It felt weird. When everyone woke up this morning and nobody said anything I figured it was because none of us are morning people. Then I texted everyone ‘what time we going out tonight?’”
And their response? They shut down the idea, so Rebecca was convinced they had other plans in the works. Turns out they didn’t! She continued:
“The replies ranged from ‘doesn’t matter to me’ to ‘maybe not tonight, it’s been a long day at work’. I STILL thought there might be something up their sleeves. But nope! They all got home and went to separate parts of the house. That’s when it actually hit me that nobody remembered. Now they’re all in bed. I went to McDonald’s and got hot chocolate. (TBF, it’s surprisingly good.)”
Oof! We’re glad she enjoyed the hot chocolate! She deserved a delicious treat after getting ignored on her b-day!
By 12:25 a.m. on Wednesday, Rebecca shared that she “decided to be passive aggressive” about the whole thing by making her own birthday cake and leaving “it in the middle of the kitchen table.” And it’s a “win” for her even if no one noticed because she got to have cake! We agree! Ch-ch-check out the final results of her baking adventure (below):
It looks delicious!
Two hours later, she “cut a slice” and got “comfy in the guest room, snuggling with my dog and watching Gilmore Girls.” And you know what? She also didn’t bother to set an alarm clock for the morning, saying:
“I hope everyone’s alarm goes off in the morning. I didn’t set mine”
Good! Hopefully Rebecca had a peaceful rest of her morning!
And to note, not everyone thankfully forgot Rebecca’s birthday! Phew! She later revealed her author pal made sure to call and sing her happy birthday on Tuesday morning:
“Because this is sounding truly depressing (and it is, no joke), you know who DIDN’T forget my birthday? My author friend, Michal. We met 11 years ago in an online writing group. He lives on the other side of the world, and we only see each other in person once a year, but he called me first thing yesterday morning to sing Happy Birthday to me. In Polish. He had added my birthday to his phone and family’s spreadsheet of important dates.”
That is a good friend right there! 
In the morning, Rebecca said her “husband left for work without a word,” which she found “weird.” She then went back to bed and woke up to find out that everyone finally realized they missed her birthday! Wow! Took them long enough! She wrote:
“My son figured it out when when he got up and found me baking the cake. It hit my daughter on the way to school and she texted me. Husband’s currently at work but I did get a ‘sorry we couldn’t do much for your birthday’ text, which makes no sense in context of this situation. I’m also not sure at which point he finally realized it.”
“Sorry we couldn’t do much for your birthday”?! Um, sir, it’s more like you DIDN’T DO ANYTHING for her birthday! What kind of half-ass apology is that? We expect more groveling than that!
Fortunately, someone did treat this queen to a proper birthday celebration — her mom! Rebecca shared an update on Wednesday night, saying:
“My sweet little mama (who raised me entirely alone) took me out to dinner to celebrate. We went to my favorite local restaurant where everyone knows me by name, has known my kids since they were babies, and always remembers my birthday. So shout out to La Cabana!”
Amazing! Ch-ch-check out the dinner pics (below):
View this post on Instagram
As for the rest of her family…
Rebecca went on to defend her children, saying:
“I don’t blame my kids. They’re actually amazing people and I’m super proud of them. We’ve had a lot of adventures together and there’s nobody else I’d rather spend my time with. My son’s birthday is 5 days after mine and he’s the best present I’ve ever received. My daughter is beautiful, smart, and has a huge heart. Life’s hard for teens in general. I couldn’t imagine trying to traverse teenagedom today. However, eating my icing straight out of the jar was a bit much lol That wasn’t cool.”
What a sweet mother she is! The momma also clarified in the comments that her kids “apologized” to her afterward! Her husband, on the other hand? He is not getting a free pass like their teens! She called his response “lame” and an example that there are much bigger problems in their marriage:
“My husband’s response was ‘sorry we couldn’t do more for your birthday’ which, yeah, is lame AF. It implies that something was done and that the day was acknowledged. It wasn’t. Others have accurately suggested that there’s more going on than just ‘forgetting’ and you guys are right. I’ve been reevaluating my choices and situation for the past year and this was just a symptom of a much bigger problem. But, for the sake of my daughter (who’s still just a kid) I don’t want to say more publicly.”
Rebecca then owned up to sharing the story for attention, but can you blame her? Her family forgot about her birthday! That would be upsetting to anyone enough to go online and seek comfort from others! And the author never expected the amount of support and care she received:
“Some have suggested that I did this for attention & they’re not totally wrong. At the end of a long day I was feeling sad so I posted on a platform that I figured was ‘safe’ (my others have a lot of family members). I thought I might find a few people who could commisserate. Maybe we could support each other? I had no idea it would blow up like it did &, frankly, I’ve been overwhelmed. Not just by the arbitrary numbers but by the amount of people showing concern & care for a total stranger.”
Rebecca continued:
“The fact that this resonated with so many women, and probably some men, is telling. It’s not about a birthday. I think for many of us it’s about not feeling acknowledged or appreciated throughout the rest of the year. Many of us, for whatever reason, lose ourselves in marriage and parenthood. At 46, for the sake of myself AND my kids, I really want to refocus on finding myself again. That will probably entail making some very big, difficult changes. It’s scary & a little sad, but that’s life.”
It’s sad how many people, especially parents, know exactly how Rebecca is feeling right now — like you pour everything into everyone else only to be forgotten on your birthday. Oof. She at least has a community surrounding her, and for that she is grateful. Concluding the lengthy thread, she thanked everyone for “checking in” on her:
“You’ve shown a lot of kindness and I’ve pretty much spent the past 20 hours laughing and crying at all the comments. (My 79 year old mom thinks this is amazing.) And if you’re someone this has also happened to then I’m sorry. It sucks. You deserve to be celebrated and to feel loved. I hope you’re able to do something for yourself that makes YOU feel great.”
We’re wishing Rebecca a happy belated birthday! Let’s hope her family makes it up to her after ditching her on her special day! Reactions, Perezcious readers? Sound OFF in the comments!
[Image via Rebecca Patrick-Howard/Instagram]
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