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Nobody Likes Jessica Alba

Filed under: Film Flickers > Jessica Alba

112106_spn_alba05.jpg

If she weren't such a twat, we might feel bad for her.

Jessica "Don't Call Me Latina" Alba's new movie, Good Luck Chuck, is a disappointment at the box office.

Co-starring Dane Cook, Alba's Good Luck Chuck took in just $5.1 million on Friday. She will be lucky if the film takes in even $14 million total this weekend. And expect a big drop off next weekend.

Doing surprisingly well, though, is Milla Jovovich's Resident Evil: Extinction. The film took in a robust $9.6 mill on Friday and is expected to take in $23.5 million this weekend, better than previously projected.

Don't Call Me Latina may be pretty to look at, but she can't open a film!

[Image via Mavrix Online.]

293 comments to “Nobody Likes Jessica Alba”

More comments: [1] 2 3 »

  1. dd says – reply to this


    1

    first?

  2. ana says – reply to this


    2

    omg i went and watched that movie…wohoho first!!

  3. sherri says – reply to this


    3

    Jessica whom?

  4. Wanda says – reply to this


    4

    first!

  5. super city says – reply to this


    5

    what's Lindsay been up to?

  6. ana says – reply to this


    6

    omg i went and saw that movie…and it was just me and mah friend…anywho…first!!!

  7. ann says – reply to this


    7

    I hate jessica alba. I rather have Hayden Panitierre or w/e the fuck her name is.

  8. Jamie says – reply to this


    8

    Speak for yourself queer. I think Jessica is very lovely.

  9. ann says – reply to this


    9

    haha look at her FEET.

  10. Cal says – reply to this


    10

    First! She's still HOT!

  11. ang says – reply to this


    11

    first

  12. Coco says – reply to this


    12

    Haha. She sucks!

  13. lucky says – reply to this


    13

    jessica can suck my immagenary balls that stupid slut.she fucked me brother

  14. juanito says – reply to this


    14

    is it on local cable late tonight

  15. aww says – reply to this


    15

    awww

  16. kete says – reply to this


    16

    still damn pretty this woman :(

  17. k says – reply to this


    17

    is she a biatch in real life or something?,,,,,y the twat comment?…. n i think we all knew that movie would bomb y do i wanna sit thru and hour n a half thru bad physical comedy??

  18. nico says – reply to this


    18

    im so glad no one is falling for that dane cook/ pretty girl combination crap!!

  19. Ann says – reply to this


    19

    She's a total bitch. I asked for a picture with her one time and she said, "I don't take pictures with people shorter than 5'5" because it makes me look humongous" Wow bitch right?

  20. Sharz says – reply to this


    20

    who gives a fuck? first

  21. dfsdf says – reply to this


    21

    I don't understand why it was rated R, thats why it took in so much less money. If it would have been pg-13 all these little horny highschool teens would have probably went to go see it.

  22. Naki says – reply to this


    22

    Sometimes, pretty just doesn't get you that far…

  23. all4jt says – reply to this


    23

    Leave her alone! Look at Fantastic 4, that was a great opening!

  24. GASTON says – reply to this


    24

    BLAME DANE COOK!

  25. Disgruntled says – reply to this


    25

    Perez, you missed the ironic moustache train by three years. Oh and she made more money on a flop movie than you will for doing ten Z-list celebrity shows on MTV.

  26. jonhjhfdhdshahaha says – reply to this


    26

    third muahaha

  27. Jasmine says – reply to this


    27

    Fuck a pretty face if she has no pride in her heritage!

    Wish I was latina…

  28. an says – reply to this


    28

    first. aw i love jessica

  29. krystel says – reply to this


    29

    overrated chipmunk cheek whore! That movie looks retarded.

  30. john3243fdsfhaha says – reply to this


    30

    okay more like 30th lololol

  31. danielle says – reply to this


    31

    shes not funny

  32. Ann says – reply to this


    32

    Yeah, if only she took better acting classes and was a little less stuck up maybe people would like her eh? Oh and if she wasn't ashamed of being Hispanic.

  33. lol says – reply to this


    33

    I don't like Jessica Alba. Never did.

  34. sqrrl says – reply to this


    34

    What's the "don't call me latina" thing about?? Did she say that? IS she latina?

  35. who cares? says – reply to this


    35

    Why are people expected to want to be proud of their heritage? Maybe she doesn't want to be called latina for a reason? Because she is american. I'm sure black people don't like being called simply "African". Perez likes to pick and choose who he hates on and this is an example of a pathetic attempt.

  36. Jessica says – reply to this


    36

    She's "generic" pretty. Nothing out of the usual.

  37. girl6 says – reply to this


    37

    she doesn't seem nice…..pretty only gets u so far……

  38. Bel says – reply to this


    38

    Awwww…it looked like a good movie to me but I love those sappy comedies!
    I always catch them on DVD anyway! Not much of a movie goer (i'm too cheap)!!

  39. duayne says – reply to this


    39

    QUACK, QUACK, QUACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  40. Kyle says – reply to this


    40

    I hate this stupid bitch and they always cast her as the scientist. Po-leeeez.

  41. dane cook sucks says – reply to this


    41

    i think it really has more to do with the fact that everything dane cook touches flops. he is filming a new movie (bachelor no. 2) in boston and i predict that will flop hard too. he isn't funny. neither are movies that rely on physical comedy. poor j-alba. just do movies where you sit a look pretty. you aren't funny either.

  42. ANSWERTHIZQUESTION says – reply to this


    42

    why did perez put her name as " jessica dont call me latina alba"??

  43. LATINA HISPANIC GIRL says – reply to this


    43

    Yep that movie is going to suck at the box office, just read the reviews…..

  44. costamesaboy says – reply to this


    44

    seems cute 2 me,,,,,,,,besides all Real actresses are lil' bitches, when they are young, durrrrrr,,,,if she is an Og. New Yorker, than she is probably naturally ignornant to Cali's culture,,,

  45. Ceylan says – reply to this


    45

    Shes walking like a penguin

  46. Lenny says – reply to this


    46

    I would drink her bath water.

  47. jstuddle says – reply to this


    47

    Uhm…like most people, I have no problem going to a Jessica Alba movie. I DO have a problem seeing a Dane Cooke movie, though. The dude sucks and unless Jessica is butt nekkid buns up kneeling, I ain't paying $10 to see that unfunny douchebag.

  48. emily says – reply to this


    48

    i'm not surprised, that literally looks like the worst movie ever made. resident evil looks cool though.

  49. o.g. p-nasty says – reply to this


    49

    She refused to go out with me…..you know because I was latino and didn't want to be seen with one

  50. Sean Awesome says – reply to this


    50

    Sean Awesome

    WE HEARD THAT PEREZ IS LOSING A WHOLE LOT OF BLOG VIEWS…. LAST WEEK HE LOST 42% OF HIS VIEWS…..PLUS THE SHOW SUCKS BALLS HAHAHAHAHAHA

    Check us out at Sean Awesome

  51. Just wondering? says – reply to this


    51

    Did she borrow AMY WINEHOUSE'S shoe. EWWWWWWWWWWWW!

  52. Robert says – reply to this


    52

    so what how much did the movie cost to make ? probably less than 10 million, it will make more than that just from DVD sales

  53. adsf says – reply to this


    53

    it's because people can tell that she's a total bitch! no amount of acting can cover up a cold heart! and who wants to pay $10 to watch some chick pretend that she's actually funny and affectionate when she's so stern in real life.

  54. coco 4 coconuts says – reply to this


    54

    her beauty is only skin deep she's a total biotch! Thanks perez 4 da update!

  55. Tim says – reply to this


    55

    She's American, not latin. I don't celebrate my european heritage either you f'ing morons.

  56. karina says – reply to this


    56

    JESSICA ALBA IS NOT LATINO! SHE IS MULTI-CULTURAL SO WHY SHOULD SHE WANT TO BE CALLED JUST A LATINA. IT IS HER CHOICE. PEOPLE WHO HAVE MIXED BACKROUNDS SHOULD NOT HAVE TO CHOOSE WHAT CULTURE THEY WANT TO BE IN THEY SHOULD RESPECT THEIR WHOLE BACKROUND. SHE IS JUST AS MUCH WHITE AS SHE IS HISPANIC. SO LET HER DEFINE HERSELF PEREZ. YOU SIT THERE AND WORRY ABOUT YOUR NEXT HAIR COLOR!

  57. Danno says – reply to this


    57

    Nice how you don't put any blame on Dane Cook for the flop

  58. Mork says – reply to this


    58

    Actually, the opening of the film isn't that bad.

  59. OLNY! says – reply to this


    59

    She's a fucking mexican! Why doesn't she want to be called "Latina"? If she was from Spain or somewhere where the people are light skin then you can ask not to be called "latina"…but she is darker then my fucking butt hole!

    Places with light skin latino's
    1.Spain
    2.Brazil
    3.Argintina
    4.Cuba
    5.ElSalvador
    6.Chile
    7.Columbia

    People with Indian Looking Features.
    1.Mexico!!!!!

  60. Tony says – reply to this


    60

    Whatever she is I think her teeth are too large.

  61. Go Perez says – reply to this


    61

    Um, yes. You're right. If J. Alba doesn't want to celebrate or even ACKNOWLEDGE her latinaness, then maybe she should give back like half of her money she made playing latina parts. I'm not saying she has to go to a march and wave a flag - but she openly makes negative and disparging comments about latino people. And then makes money off of it. She is a poor role model, a bad actress, and from what people say not very nice. I've been thinking this for YEARS and I love that Perez is here to make it offical.

    (and btw, it is possible to be proud to be American and of your ancestory. I think that's the whole of point of america, isn't it?)

  62. News Flash :) says – reply to this


    62

    Re: Danno – Good point Danno it's because… Perez is a woman H8R!

  63. Justin says – reply to this


    63

    Perez, you're not everybody! (even though you're big enough to be at least 3 people)
    Just because you don't like someone doesn't mean "NOBODY" does.
    I LOVE JESSICA ALBA!!!

  64. UK Sam says – reply to this


    64

    Perez, I love you dearly but don't forget that TWAT is the UK version of the US word "CUNT" so be careful you don't alienate your UK fans. I was a bit shocked. And you KNOW ah love yah!
    ~UK Sam

  65. the rat pack says – reply to this


    65

    i think it's funny that she dresses like girls that went to my high school.

  66. George says – reply to this


    66

    Perez, you have no talent. it's pathetic you're famous. you can't even write well and people in this country like to categorize people! SHE IS MULTICULTURAL! most are! Besides being an AMERICAN, my heritage is from 3 different countries! I don't only say I'm middle eastern because ONE country is in the Middle east..you're an idiot! I don't care that you're fat and gay, but you're just FUCKING STUPID!

  67. alisa says – reply to this


    67

    HAHHHAHA her feet.. oh man…. and i second that nico..

  68. ANTI ALBA says – reply to this


    68

    She is ugly…. I dont like her at all… and that movie looks like it sucks sh*t, it's been overdone and overplayed…. dumb clumsy girl meets a guy…..like how many of those type of movies r we gonna see???? aghhhh lame….. i dont like her at all…. her face looks like a donkey

  69. Caitlyn says – reply to this


    69

    Perez, your an idiot. your are a mean jerk who likes to be an asshole. don't make fun of Jessica just because she doesn't want to be judged for her skin color. she embraces her heritage, she just happens to feel closer to her other roots, just not particularly that one….

    so just keep your asshole mouth shut

  70. Lisa says – reply to this


    70

    Maybe the movie bombed b/c of Dane Cook. I do not see the appeal of him at all, and don't think I've ever laughed at a single thing he's said! And has he had any hits???

  71. yay perez says – reply to this


    71

    SHE JUST DOESN'T WANT TO TAKE PART IN YOUR RACE BAITING ASSHOLE
    WHO CARES IF SHES LATINO. IT ONLY MATTERS TO ME WHEN YOU PRAISE
    YOUR RACIST LATINO FRIENDS MARIO….
    YOUR A DESPICABLE MOFO
    GET PEREZ OFF THE AIR E-MAIL VH-1 AND COMPLAIN ABOUT THIS RETARD
    HE DOESN'T DESERVE SHIZIT

  72. cat says – reply to this


    72

    jessica alba sucks

  73. V says – reply to this


    73

    Doesn't look like Dane Cook can carry a movie either Perez. He is just down right annoying. Half the time he acts like he's coked up.

  74. mabb says – reply to this


    74

    dane cook is box office poison, i hate that fucking motherfucker

  75. E Nazty says – reply to this


    75

    Yeah, she seems like a bitch. I like Dane Cook though.

  76. ASC says – reply to this


    76

    She’s a fucking mexican! The olny thing that makes her american is that she was born here! None of her family is/has white roots.! BEANER BEANER BEANER!

  77. Michelle says – reply to this


    77

    The movie previews look stupid to begin with and Dane Cook sucks ass. The only reason she was cast was because of her body. Everyone knows she can't act.

  78. Jo says – reply to this


    78

    You are so stupid to keep harping on the "don't call me Latina" comment like it was a bad thing. Dumbass. What she was saying is that she wasn't raised Latina and therefore isn't going to jump on the "Ethnic" bandwagon like so many celebs "raised just plain old AMERICAN" are now doing.

  79. donna says – reply to this


    79

    Is she really that pigeon-toed???? My god, I bet she trips over her own feet. LOL. Straighten-out your feet girl.

  80. mina says – reply to this


    80

    People leave her alone!
    She chose to be white!!!!!!!!

  81. Zia says – reply to this


    81

    Well, the movie was hilarious and that's all that matters. If we based our opinions of how much we like movies by how the stars are 'in real life' that would be pretty pathetic imo.

  82. jo says – reply to this


    82

    I PERSONALLY know someone who worked with her and said she is the biggest BITCH and looks completely and utterly hideous without her makeUP on!!!!!!!!!Also that she is MEAN to little kids….i guess she was never young ?????
    HA….she will not be remembered as a good actress , she is just washed UP!

  83. Tina says – reply to this


    83

    what ever, Miss "I'm not Latina" she can kiss my ass.

  84. whore says – reply to this


    84

    jessica alba is a straight up whore
    which explains why she got herpes
    she openly talks about sleeping around and shes just plain nasty.

  85. JC says – reply to this


    85

    why would $15 million open be a dud for a comedy? It's certainly a lot better #s than Cook's last movie with Jessica Simpson.

  86. Sophia says – reply to this


    86

    Number 61, The people Of Spain, Brazil and Argentina are not light-skinned, they are in fact, European. Over 85% of the population of Argentina are Europeans who immigrated there, ditto for Brazil. Their culture is Latin their genetics European. Spaniards too are European, not hispanic. Mexico and other Latin countries are different however, they are a combination of races. Miss. Alba is clearly a combination of Indian and Spanish blood, Mesitzo. though she seems very uncomfortable with that fact.

  87. julia says – reply to this


    87

    actually, ASC, she is French/Danish/Native American/Mexican. so she does have European lineage. similar to mine actually. which is why I look like the white Jessica Alba. hehe ^^

  88. COCO says – reply to this


    88

    Well Perez, is she can't open a film, neither your friend Angelina Jolie. In fact, and this is real funny, Alba's film opened with more viewers than Angelina and her Mighty Heart Failure.

    So, what's your point?

  89. chuck says – reply to this


    89

    so she hates wetbacks so do most Americans!!

  90. b says – reply to this


    90

    omg she's miniature! look how microscopic she is next to that huge-ass car!

  91. Krista says – reply to this


    91

    While I think Jessica Alba is a bitch, I went to see the move last night. It's FUCKING funny as hell. Dane Cook is really funny. My fiance said it's almost as good as wedding crashers. It's pretty obscene, so there isn't a way it could have been PG-13. It was the only movie at the theater they were carding kids for (make sure they are 18)…it's pretty raunchy…but really funny!

  92. Isabella says – reply to this


    92

    It's to bad her beauty can't conceal the ignorance that is Jessica "dont call me latina" Alba…it ALMOST makes me feel bad for her…I am an American raised latina, PROUD OF IT! Jessica Alba sucks major Huevos rancheros!

  93. Luscious says – reply to this


    93

    I say all us PROUD Hispanics boycott her and any projects, products she is involved with. Anyone who denies heritage is so sad and one pays the consequences. I say Boycott the Bitch!

  94. Siquina says – reply to this


    94

    she has never been a good actress! she should go back to tv shows!

  95. ashley says – reply to this


    95

    duh, because the movie looks dumb as hell. who wants to watch some bimbo run into, fall on, and break things for 90 minutes?

  96. ashley says – reply to this


    96

    duh, because the movie looks dumb as hell. who wants to watch some bimbo run into, fall on, and break things for 90 minutes?

  97. synmar says – reply to this


    97

    Her film is a dud because Dane Cook is in it! The other movie he did with Jessica Simpson also flopped. Blame Dane!!!! And leave Jessica alone! She's a human!!!

  98. Hector says – reply to this


    98

    I don't see why you don't like her. SHE'S NOT LATIN !! she's american, she has latin roots, that's all, that doesn't mean she has to speak spanish or go dancing salsa and stuff.
    Don't be stupid Perez! and I'm latin !

  99. wowseyCASTRO says – reply to this


    99

    I will go see ANYTHING that has Dane Cook in it.

  100. kim says – reply to this


    100

    perez, you're an asshole. get over yourself and stop hating on jessica alba. the movie was good - who cares about sales? you're just pissed because she's hot and well, you're not.

More comments: [1] 2 3 »