[Warning: Potentially Triggering Content]
This family’s story is heartbreaking from beginning to end…
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Dealing With Darkness
It all started earlier this month when 41-year-old Bailey Koch got vulnerable online about her husband Jeremy‘s mental health. In a GoFundMe she set up, the mother of two described her husband’s mental state:
“May is mental health awareness month, so here we are…making you aware. We are as vanilla as it gets…middle class Nebraska family. I’m a special education teacher and my husband runs our family landscaping and greenhouse services business we’ve owned for the last 19 years. We have two teenage boys…the oldest will graduate high school next week and then move to California for a three-year bonsai apprenticeship (yes, he’s a pretty cool kid). Our youngest is a freshman and a rockstar golfer on the varsity team. Proud parents here.”
Sounds like a lovely family. Except for a darkness underneath… Bailey went on to say Jeremy was “diagnosed with severe depression in 2009”:
“But my husband tries to kill himself…a lot … We finally began sharing our reality in 2015 after Jeremy had survived at least four attempts, the worst was near-fatal in 2012…a car accident in which he drove straight into a semi on the highway. He was left with a leg broken in four places, punctured lung, fractured pancreas, complete colon reconstruction, brain bleed, and…still depression. When he awoke, I was in awe and relieved. He was destroyed his attempt hadn’t worked.”
Gut-wrenching. So horrible to hear.
Bailey said her husband “fights for his mental health harder than anyone I know.” He even went seven years where he seemed to be in recovery… But it didn’t last. In the summer of 2024 their business started struggling because he couldn’t work. And the failure of the business and stress over money caused him to sink deeper into depression.
The Incident
In March of this year things took a dark turn. Bailey wrote in her GoFundMe post in May:
“In March, just a couple months ago, I woke to Jeremy shaking me awake saying, ‘Something is wrong.’ He was standing over my bed with a knife ready to end his life.”
To be clear, Bailey was only worried about suicide at that moment. She recalled:
“I was able to talk him down and into accepting help. He went to our safe place, Richard Young Hospital in Kearney, Nebraska, for inpatient mental health treatment for the fourth time in our marriage and stayed for four nights and five days. They tried to level out meds and keep him safe.”
From there, Bailey worked even harder. She had Jeremy try several types of treatments for his mental health, even “electroconvulsive therapy”! But it “didn’t work.” Nothing did. She noted he was “med resistant and med sensitive” — meaning little positive effect but extra awful side effects.
Related: FOUR Sheriff’s Deputies In One County Die By Suicide In Just Six Weeks
The decline in his mental health led to one in his physical health as well:
“Jeremy became a shell of himself. We stopped treatments on Monday, April 28th, because symptoms were becoming progressively worse. Jeremy cannot get out of bed unless forced. He does not eat or drink unless I make him. He cannot take his meds or remember how to function as the very busy and loving adult he truly is.”
So sad… She took him to the hospital, which was — as we all know — extremely expensive. Pleading for help, Bailey candidly said:
“So here I am…asking for help. I have taken out every penny we have to pay bills. My retirement is gone. Jeremy’s retirement is gone. I have begun the process of looking into selling our family business because the stress is too much on my husband, and nothing is worth losing him. So we will give it all up. Jesus, take the wheel. I have no pride left. Mental illness is taking my husband from me, and I’m begging you to open your eyes and see the reality that is this society’s mental health crisis.”
Out Of The Frying Pan
A few days later, on May 8 — just last week — Bailey gave an update on the situation. Jeremy was out of the hospital. It sounds like a positive update. It wasn’t:
“I wish I had better news, as Jeremy was so happy to be released from the mental health hospital yesterday to go home in time for our oldest son’s high school graduation on Saturday. But it appears Jeremy is reacting negatively to our attempt with a new mental health med…one he’s been on for a whole three nights. He had a very hard time getting out of bed this morning, then after I left, he called me while I was on my way to work and told me he was going back to bed.”
Bailey seemed to be doing everything she could to help her husband, as she detailed she was reminding him of his “coping skills” and she was able to “talk him into going to work”. She said he did tell her about some “suicidal thoughts” again, but he wouldn’t immediately be going back to a treatment facility. After learning of a new treatment option, though, they felt more hopeful. This time it was Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation. Jeremy would never try it.
Don’t Be Afraid To Share
Bailey was a thoughtful storyteller. She included a photo of a fortune cookie on the fundraiser, writing:
“The photo I attached here is from Jeremy’s fortune cookie last night when we stopped to eat in Kearney after he busted out of the hospital. His fortune read, ‘Don’t be afraid to share your experiences with the world.’ We’re not.”
But even with all the help and support from their community, there was just no saving this poor family. This would be Bailey’s final update, as just days later on May 10, the unthinkable would happen. Jeremy was about to share his experience with his family.
According to a press release from the Nebraska State Patrol, Jeremy, Bailey, and their two sons — 18-year-old Hudson and 16-year-old Asher — were all found dead in their home on Saturday. The police are treating this as a “murder-suicide.” They believe Jeremy killed his family before ultimately dying by suicide. In the report, law officials detailed:
“All four were found with fatal knife wounds. A knife was found at the scene.”
Just terrible.
Bailey’s father, Lane Peg Kugler, penned a lengthy letter on Facebook on behalf of the family. He wrote in part:
“I am so angry. And you should be too. I will explain why later in this letter. Yesterday morning, May 10, 2025, at 9:45AM, I found our two grandsons Hudson 18, and Asher 16, and our daughter Bailey, and our son-in-law Jeremy, dead laying in their beds. What I saw will haunt me the rest of my life. Jeremy had killed them and himself. Jeremy had been fighting mental illness for many, many years. His depression had turned into psychosis. It was not Jeremy that committed this horrific act. It was a sick mind.”
He went on to explain how the entire family fought this mental health crisis to the bitter end and that the family believes “heaven now has four new angels sitting at the right hand of God”. He also used the letter to advocate for better mental health resources in the United States:
“This country’s mental health care is a disaster. A catastrophe. Broken. And it’s not getting any better, it’s getting worse.”
Wrapping up, he told readers to never give up:
“We can make a difference. Bailey believed that with all her heart. We can help our fellow human beings. Don’t give up. Bailey didn’t. Right up to her last breath.”
See his full letter (below):
Such a powerful statement. Our heart goes out to this family as they grieve.
R.I.P.
For resources on mental health, visit https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/find-help.
If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, help is available. Consider contacting the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988, by calling, texting, or chatting, or go to 988lifeline.org.
If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, help is available. Consider calling the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233, or text START to 88788, or go to https://www.thehotline.org/.
[Image via Bailey Koch/Facebook]
