Ya know, the other one!

Who can even keep track?!

Since she's already effed (allegedly!) Justin Bobby, Kristin Cavallari has turned her man-eating yoni onto another victim, Tal Cooperman.

And, of course, Copperman is one of those many dudes who actually aimed to have Audrina's eyes roll towards the ceiling!

The pair dated last summer and although it didn't go far, we expect Kristin and Audrina to hash it out! Because what the eff else do they have to do?!

“It’s brand new. They’re having a lot of fun enjoying getting to know each other better,” said a source regarding Kristin's new relationshit. “It’s not for the show. They hit it off and have been hanging out off-camera."

Riiiight.

They don't wanna be seen! That's why they had dinner on Thursday at Nobu, partied at the ESPN bash and were spotted making out at El Lay's Voyeur.

Bring out the claws! Meow!

[Image via WENN.]

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Kristin Cavallari is under the illusion that her show is at #1.

The producers are obviously slipping something into her morning latte and handing her old editions of TV Guide!

We reported recently that since the departure of Lauren Conrad and the arrival of Kristin, The Hills has stared to roll down in the ratings, grabbing numbers nowhere near as good as the olden days.

A serious actor would look at that kind of news and attempt to work with the producers and writers to fix the problem. For Kristin, it means denying that anything is wrong and shoving the blame onto everyone else BUT her if it is.

She says:

"No, they are not! We had one drop because of the Hip Hop awards on VH1, but then they went up the next week…At the end of the day it's not up to me to make a great TV show. It's the whole crew, the whole cast. It's not just on me. I think to put all that pressure on me is pretty unfair."

If you can't handle the burden, get back into obscurity!

[Image via WENN.]

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We say, BLAME KRISTIN CAVALLARI!!!

Things were just peachy before that bitch showed up! We know you're with us, Audrina Patridge! Thank goodness you're getting your own show!

The new direction of The Hills (Plus Kristin and minus Lauren Conrad) has caused viewership to fall dramatically. The ratings fell 30% for the season premiere and only managed to bring in 1.72 million viewers on last Tuesday's episode.

Ouch!

Sources are suggesting that audiences find Kristin to be less "engaging/enraging" than the former villains of the series, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt. They seem to be quite content these days in their own little newlywed world and have no time to cause drama for the other castmates.

Furthermore, the producer's Kristin's tactics to start drama for the show are too reminiscent of her days on Laguna Beach (i.e. - she's hooking up with Justin Bobby in order to create this love triangle thing with Audrina. Been there, done that, cancel the show!)

Could this be the end of The Hills?! Has Speidi seen it's day?! Has Kristin destroyed the franchise?!

We sincerely hope so!

[Image via WENN.]

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Kristin Cavallari basically admitted what we've been telling you the whole time: The Hills is fake.

Shocker!

The "actress" was interviewed by the L.A. Times to talk about her starring role on the show, her time on Laguna Beach and all the "dramz!"

Here are some HIGHlights:

On the producers:
"I pretty much do anything they have me do because I don't care. I mean, we're filming a TV show. Let's make it interesting. Let's have a good time with it."

On Laguna Beach and hating the way she was made out to be the villain:
"I almost felt like it was unfair for [MTV] to come into our lives at such a young age and sort of mess with things. I don't regret it, but I was 17 — of course I wanted to be on TV. I felt like they should have been a little bit more careful with us."

On showing up to work at "pre-selected" locations Wednesday through Friday:
"They tell us what to talk about. Listen, I have fun with it. They film Curb Your Enthusiasm the same way."

On her reality:
"The thing is, if this was a reality show about my life, they would follow me going to auditions and studying with acting coaches, but they didn't want to show that because it's not glamorous. They make it seem like we have perfect lives and like we have all this money."

On The Hills' "reality:"
"Everyone is trying to get story lines and create drama in their lives. It's just so…fake. There's no truth to it. At all."

LOLs at Kristin comparing The Hills to Curb Your Enthusiasm! We're sure Larry David loves that.

And come on, Cavallari!

We don't buy for one second that you don't have "all this money," Ms. 90K Per Episode!

[Image via PNP / WENN.]

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We all know there's drama and jealousy on the set of MTV's The Hills.

But with this new piece of information leaked, we have a feeling there's gonna be a lot more behind-the-scenes drama.

Turns out the reality TV "stars" are making more per episode than many people make in a year.

But it's not an even scale.

Turns out troublemaker Kristin Cavallari is raking in $90,000 per episode! So you'd think the villains get paid more, right? Wrong. Bring in Spencer Pratt, and he's only making $65,000 per episode.

And that's nothing compared to Audrina Patridge's $100,000 per episode! Or Heidi Montag's close to $100,000 salary. Turns out Spencer is down at $65,000 since he joined only in 2008.

However, the top earner goes to former Hills star Lauren Conrad who was racking in $125,000 per episode ($2.5 million a year). Plus her contract demanded that no other star's salary could match hers while she was on the show.

Even sellout Brody Jenner is making some good cash. Jenner makes $45,000 per episode.

And that's what everyone's making not including their side jobs. Like fashion lines, books, music singles, and paid appearances.

Craziness!

Let's hope they're all investing wisely. Some of them will most likely not have another paycheck after The Hills.

[Image via WENN.]

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We can all thank Kristin Cavallari for creating Hollywood's biggest fame-whoring couple, who will forever be known as Speidi!

While talking with Dan Levy, host of The Hills Aftershow on MTV Canada, Kristin apologized for introducing Heidi Montag to King Douche Spencer Pratt.

"I want to apologize to everybody," she said. "I had no idea what it would turn into."

Even though the apology is a little late, at least she's owning up to her deed. Unfortunately, the world now has to live with it.

Maybe she can finish what she started and break them up before they reproduce? We're sure MTV could write that into the script!

[Image via WENN.]

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As if we needed MORE proof The Hills is scripted!

Kristin Cavallari is not actually dating Justin "Bobby" Brescia according to In Touch. Although her rep denies the story, Kristin is actually in a hush-hush relationship with nobody LA businessman Sonny Smith.

"Kristin and Sonny are an item, but he knows that she has to pretend to date Justin Bobby if she wants to stay on The Hills. It's a complicated situation," an insider says.

What's complicated about it? She's a famewhore that needs to lie to keep her job!

Sonny himself didn't confirm or deny their relationship, but he did say that they "have been friends for awhile" and they "hang out."

We bet you do more than that, Sonny!

[Image via WENN.]

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We can't decide whether this is genuinely the truth or if MTV is trying to pull a fast one on y'all and drag the VMAs into The Hills scripted "reality"!!

Ceiling Eyes has pulled out of her presenting duties at Sunday's Video Music Awards in NYC because she found out she'll be presenting with Kristin Cavallari!

Meow!

"Audrina hates Kristin, and MTV sprung this on her last minute so she decided to cancel," a source dished to In Touch Weekly. "She doesn't even want to be in the same room with Kristin."

Patridge's stylist and hair and makeup team have been warned by Audrina not to book a job with another celeb for the VMAs or else.

Bitchy bitchy!

Of course, Kristin is more than pleased by the news of Audrina's last-minute cancellation.

Says a friend of Cavallari's: "Kristin is happy she won't be with Audrina. They never got along and Kristin is the star of The Hills, not Audrina."

Do U think it was Ceiling Eyes' decision, or did MTV play a heavy hand in Patridge pulling out????

[Image via WENN.]

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John Mayer did as all good celebrities do and took to his Twitter last night to address the rumors that he's been hooking up with Kristin Cavallari for the past two years.

Mayer tweets:

"Rumor control: How do I put this like a gentleman…I have never high fived Kristin Cavalari with my penis."

"I'm sure she's a wonderful gal but we have never tasted the Skittles Rainbow together."

"My Milli has never slam danced with her Vanilli."

"I have never Bensoned her Hedges, nor have I attempted to Bartle her James."

Oh, that John Mayer, SUCH a comedian.

And Maniston breathes a sigh of relief!

P.S. CLICK HERE to follow Perez Hilton on Twitter!

[Image via WENN.]

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