With the absolutely insane amount of media attention given to Michael Jackson this past week and-a-half, certian media outlets are seriously piecing together scraps to come up with stories.

We thought we'd share with you some of the most ridiculous and/or factitious headlines we've recently come across!

Let's get started!

- Michael Jackson Tour: He’ll do shows as a hologram

Reports claim that Michael's father Joe, along with MJ's brothers Jermaine, Tito, Marlon and Jackie, want to tour as the Jackson 5 with their brother Michael performing beside them as a hologram.

It's also being reported that the Jacksons are hoping to have the Michael hologram perform at his own memorial on Tuesday in Los Angeles.

Captain EO revival???

- Jackson's secret girlfriend was his children's former nanny Grace Rwaramba

MJ with a secret girlfriend???

There are media outlets claiming that his kids' former nanny, Grace Rwaramba, was involved in a 3-year secret relationship with the King of Pop and his children even called her "mom". Sources say Jackson and Rwaramba were "more like a married couple" and considered the kids "her babies."

Will she be claiming custody of the children as well????

And, finally…

- Michael Jackson to be buried without his brain

As fake as this sounds, it's reportedly been confirmed by the Los Angeles Coroners Department that Jackson's brain has been removed from his skull to perform neurological tests on the late King of Pop's grey matter. His brain tissue will be examined to reveal any past drug abuse, diseases or if he had ODed in the past.

Neurological tests cannot be performed until two weeks after a person dies because the brain needs to harden, but once the test results are in, the true cause of Jackson's death will finally be known.

Crazy crazy crazy.

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Could ABBA be able to replace Michael Jackson's residency at the O2 and sell out all 50 nights on their own?

What about ABBA and rock legends Led Zeppelin???

The word is AEG Live has offered both Zeppelin and ABBA some major dough to play alternating nights at the O2 Arena in London in the place of the late King of Pop.

Led Zeppelin played their first show in 19 years at the O2 back in 2007; could we be seeing a 25-show encore in the near future?

Shares a source: "Only Michael Jackson could sell out 50 nights at such a big arena, but Led Zeppelin and Abba combined might just rival him. There is huge money on the table."

Hey, money talks!

Update: Benny Andersson of ABBA is denying talk of a reunion.

[Image via WENN.]

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As we previously mentioned, hte DEA is now lending a helping hand to the LAPD in the ongoing investigation of Michael Jackson's death.

Their latest (and most believable) target?

Five different doctors who prescribed drugs to the King of Pop!

LAPD found medicine bottles strewn around Jackson's home prescribed to MJ's pseudonyms and some bottles with no prescription at all!

The police and the DEA are planning to question the doctors responsible for the bulk of Jackson's prescriptions to find out if Michael was receiving "properly prescribed" medications or if there was any shady business going on.

The investigation will be headed by the authorities behind the investigation of the doctors who supplied the late Anna Nicole Smith with improper prescriptions, so they've gotta be the best in the biz, right?

As we mentioned before, "numerous bottles" of the heavy duty sedative Diprivan were found around Michael's home, even though Diprivan is a drug that is normally administered by an anesthesiologist in a hospital or medical care facility.

Abusers of Diprivan normally use the drug to overcome both insomnia and anxiety. “A lot of people do it because it makes you completely blotto. It totally takes away all anxiety, all fear,” explained University of Colorado anesthesiologist Paul Wischmeyer. “It’s incredibly relieving of pain, anxiety and stress. People do it to escape.”

In studies of Diprivan abusers attempting to combat anxiety with the sedative, abusers had “experienced trauma earlier in their life, and are using it to escape," said Wischmeyer.

Sad. Sad.

Drugs are not the answer!

[Image via WENN.]

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London. Saturday night. The O2 Arena, the same venue where the King of Pop was scheduled to perform a series of 50 concerts.

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The odds of nabbing a ticket to Michael Jackson's memorial are now slimmer!

Paper thin, even.

The lottery was originally only open to residents of the States, but the drawing to win two tickets to the memorial at LA's Staples Center on Tuesday is now open to the entire world.

According to the new rules, "additional legal terms have been incorporated into the conditions of entry to allow non-U.S. residents the opportunity to register for the random ticket drawing."

Good luck, universe!

You've got until 6:00 pm PT!

[Image via WENN.]

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The Staples Center must have bulked up their servers big time!

The venue's website was visited over 500 million times within the first hour of opening registration for Michael Jackson's memorial!!!!

Out of those 500 million, only 17,500 fans will be awarded a ticket for the memorial service through a lottery.

Although the Jackson family set up the lottery to cut down on confusion, you just know that shiz will be on Craigslist in a few days for major $$$$$!

[Image via WENN.]

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The biggest allegation attached to Michael Jackson's rumored drug abuse problem is that Michael was particularly fond of anesthesia. Some reports have suggested that he had doctors prescribe the medication to use in his home, something that is never done.

Now, reports are coming in that Michael has many many medical procedures, many that didn't require anesthesia, simply so he could request it.

Mostly, the procedures were minor, such as collagen injections,Botox, and acne treatment. He would demand to be put under or sedated, even though it was not medically necessary in these kinds of outpatient procedures.

Perhaps this not only give us a glimpse into his drug problem, but also the ridiculous amount of surgeries he endured.

How very sad.

Shame on those doctors!

[Image via WENN.]

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We wouldn't expect anything less for the King of Pop!

The specs for Michael Jackson's coffin have come in and it is elaborate, to say the least.

Costing a whopping $25,000, the casket is solid bronze, plated in 14-karat gold. The custom designed casket's interior is flame blue velvet and the exterior will have a mirror finish.

A resting place fitting for Michael Jackson.

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Michael Jackson is dead. And that sucks. It really does.

The saddest part of the sudden death of Michael Jackson is the loss of the artist who created such iconic music. Though there are rumors of secret musical vaults and unheard tracks, reports are now coming in that Jackson was working on two separate albums while also preparing for his tour.

One album was to stay true to his roots, staying in the pop genre, but the other would have been made up of instrumental compositions. On his pop record, Jackson collaborated with Claude Kelly and Akon, who recalls Jackson being motivated for the new tour by his fans and his children, who had never seen him perform live. The classical album was headed by composer David Michael Frank, who was invited to Jackson'sHolmby Hills home several months ago to assist with the orchestration.

The only consolation?

It's only a matter of time before these recordings are finished and released!

[Image via WENN.]

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