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Japan FINALLY Bans Possession Of Child Pornography! But There Are STILL Exclusions To The Law!

Filed under: Legal MattersGIFsNews

better late than never japan finally bans child pornography

It took way too long, but at least it's happened.

Japan has finally made possession of child pornography a punishable offense, but they've also infuriated a lot of people with the exclusions they've left out of the bill.

While many have applauded Japan’s Parliament for voting to outlaw possession of child pornography — something noticeably absent from the country's 1999 law that banned production and distribution, but not possession - others are wondering why the new law still allows

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XXX Stars Are Bent Out Of Shape By Samuel L. Jackson's Porn Piracy Comments…And Probably By Penises, Too.

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Nick Fury is a chronic masturbator?

Huh, we've heard the old wives' tale about how stroking the salamander can make you go blind, but we never realized it happened one eye at a time!

It's true, though! During a recent press junket for Captain America: The Winter Soldier, resident badass Samuel L. Jackson basically copped to buttering his own corncob on the reg!

Remember the part of the flick where The Cap' makes a list of cool things he missed out on while on ice? SammyJack, Scarlett Johansson, and Chris Evans were each asked about their favorite development of the past half-century, what they would put on their list, and Sam's answer was shocking!

He said

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Disgusting Illinois Representative Keith Farnham Charged With Trading Child Pornography: "Twelve Is About As Old As I Can Handle"

illinois representative keith farnham charged with trading child pornography allegedly said twelve is about as old as i can handle

If these allegations are true, this guy is straight pond scum.

An Illinois Representative and retired Navy veteran Keith Farnham stepped down from his government post last month, and cited health concerns as the reason. At the time he said:

"I have been battling serious health issues for a number of years, and the coming months will require my full attention."

What he failed to mention however that his health issues were of the mental sort, and his house had actually been raided a week before his March 19th resignation. Since then Farnham has been charged with trading child pornography on his personal computer and his work computer.

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World's Saddest Porn Has An Ending So Heartbreaking That You'll Be Leaking Salty Fluids Out Of An Entirely Different Orifice!

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WARNING: Nothing about this post is safe for work. Seriously, did you even read the headline? What did you think would happen when you clicked on this story?

Whoever said pornography is a victimless art form clearly hasn't seen Slut Teen Gets Knocked Up by Accidental Creampie!

The popular porn scene has well over 280K views on Pornhub, which isn't surprising considering Pi Day was just last week, but at the end of the video there's a real figurative shocker!

It's seriosuly the most heart-wrenching love story to hit celluloid since The Notebook!

After our wide-eyed young starlet sucks, f*cks, and Donald Ducks our leading man, he does what all creampie studs do! He leaves her with a protein-filled present for her insides!!!

(Settle down, that's probably how you were conceived, too!)

After her vagina fades to white and the movie fades to black, we're left with an epilogue so tragic it'll break your boner!!!

Ch-ch-check out the ending so scandalous we're half convinced it was penned by Shonda Rhimes…AFTER THE JUMP!!!

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Miley Cyrus Gets Another Finger Poke?! Annie Lennox Slams "Highly Styled Pornography"!

Filed under: Celebrity FeudsMiley CyrusFacebookDivas

miley cyrus annie lennox pornography

It sounds like Miley Cyrus is getting another finger wag! And not a foam one either!

On her Facebook page this weekend, Eurythmics rocker and diva pioneer Annie Lennox had some not-so-thinly veiled words about Mileybird's recent controversy. She wrote:

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Joseph Gordon-Levitt Knows People Are Masturbating To His Hot Bod!

joseph gordon levitt knows people masturbate to him

Well this is embarrassing…

Who told Joseph Gordon-Levitt our sexy secret?!?

LOLz!

Honestly, who HASN'T had a JGL fantasy? Especially lately! That boy is looking better than ever these days!

Joe knows he's one desirable dude too because last night, he admitted to Stephen Colbert that he's aware people are masturbating to him!

ZOMG!

Stephen was asking Joe about his Don Jon character's inability to take his mind off of porn even while having sex with Scarlet Johansson! Mr. Colbert told a bold-faced lie and claimed not to masturbate to porn EVER, because as he put it:

"Pornography masturbates to me!"

Whatever you say, Stephen!

Joseph then interjected:

"People masturbate to me!"

Truer words have never been spoken!

HA!

Ch-ch-check out Joseph Gordon-Levitt letting it all hang out on The Colbert ReportAFTER THE JUMP!!!

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Mila Kunis MUST Make A Sex Tape, Preferably With Jennifer Lawrence!

Filed under: Mila KunisJennifer LawrenceSex

mila kunis tops jennifer lawrence sex tape poll vivid

The ballots were cast, and the votes are in!

Vivid Entertainment polled porn aficionados around the world to determine which seXXXy mainstream star they would really love to watch bang on camera, but you might not believe who they picked!

And the survey says…

Mila Kunis! She took 38% of the vote!!!

Wowzers! This is a bit of an upset considering last month Jennifer Lawrence won the very same title!!

Aww! We're sure the sticky keyboard club would gratefully give each gal a tiara if it meant they'd star together in a girl-on-girl video, LOLz!!

You could call it Friends with Benefits… and Double-Sided Dildos!

We wonder whether they'll give the people what they want! Ha!!

[Image via WENN.]

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